Black Girl Lost (You’re Worth More Than Sex)
Earlier this week I was sitting on my couch waiting for the phone to ring so I could do yet another interview when my BlackBerry went off. I reached for the silver device by my side and saw that I had another comment on one of my posts. It was a screen name I didn’t recognize and related to one of my archived posts from back in November, so I clicked the trackball and read the following disturbing message:
“WOW Y’all talking about sex makes me feel so relax I would love to have somebody that I will have sex with more than 5 times per day and that’s definatly (sic) millions of times per week how is that lol? If anyone is interested and want that real good sex send me email to firstname.lastname@example.org see ya.”
Needless to say I was shocked. I couldn’t believe that a woman would just throw herself out there like that. Yeah, we’re all adults and most of us enjoy sex, but there should be some sort of coherent method to the selection process, right? It shouldn’t just be a first come, first serve basis. Or maybe that’s just me. Whatever the case is, I couldn’t just let that message go unanswered. No, not to take her up on her offer, but to offer this child some advice so I wrote the following response:
@ MS. XXXXX
Peace sis, I don’t know you and mean no offense by this. But is sex that good/important that you post your email to get it from God knows who? What about getting to know someone, knowing the person’s sexual history, when their last STD test was, what their goals are first? And that goes both ways for whoever may or may not respond.
I deplore implore you to read this post: ?CLICK HERE. I’m not judging you because like I said I don’t know you and I hope this doesn’t offend you but I’m sure there’s more to you and you want more from a man than having sex a million times a day.
That was my initial PC response. Even after I hit post, though, I felt like there was a bigger problem that needed to be addressed. I have no idea who this woman is or if she even exists. One person who responded to my appalled message I Tweeted shortly after reading it, asked, “Was it really her that posted that or was her account hacked? No self-respecting woman would post something like that.”
Perhaps, but something in my gut doubts it. So my (online) friend raised a very good question: What self-respecting woman would solicit sex so publicly and randomly? None, I gather. I know we spoke about how some women view their vagina as “sacred” the other day on “The Demise of Dating” post. This is clearly an example of someone that didn’t get the memo.
You know what; let me stop beating up this woman who commented. All she did was comment, I don’t want her or any of my other readers to feel like I don’t appreciate your thoughts and then I’ll turn around and attack you. Instead, I’ll just talk in general about the millions of others out there that are just like her.
Is this the reality that we now live in, where sex means so little? That giving up the goods is a mouse click away? I don’t want to believe that, but every time I turn on Maury Povich, Jerry Springer or whoever else cornered the market on the daytime television’s paternity test bonanza that people—both young and old—are doing too much. I for one would never sleep with a woman that just threw it away so easily. If you don’t even want it then why the hell should I? Just because you think sex makes your world go round doesn’t mean mine operates the same way.
Earlier this week I spoke on kids as young as 12-years old “sexting” each other nude pictures. Who’s to say it stops with the flicks? Chances are these kids are doing the nasty and whole lot more we don’t know about—drugs, gangs, take your pick. I just don’t get the mentality and where it’s coming from. We can blame the media, the music, the television, the parents or the price of tea in Beijing, but it won’t stop the problem.
I’m sorry, but I’m disturbed by the fact that a young woman feels it’s cool to hop on the Internet and offer up some of “that good sex” to any and everyone in eyeshot so she can “have sex with more than 5 times per day and that’s definatly (sic) millions of times per week how is that lol?” How’s that? “That” is bullshit. Get a job. Go to school. Read a book. Build something. Have a real fuckin’ conversation. Play with your coochie if you’re that hot and bothered. But don’t think that what’s between your legs is more important than what’s between your ears.
I don’t care if you’re male or female, young or old, Black, White, purple or blue, you should be able to offer some one more than just “good sex.” Any animal can fuck, but you are an individual with our own thoughts, goals, dreams and aspirations that are way more important and hold much more weight with real men/women. If all you have to offer is a piece of moist flesh then that’ll be the extent of your value. It all comes down to respect, if you don’t respect yourself; chances are no one else will. I have no idea if the woman that inspired this rant ever got the message, but I hope you did.
What’s your take on the young lady’s online solicitation? Did I overreact? Could you respect a man/woman that did something like that? Do you feel as if kids today are oversexed? Do people put too much value in their sexuality? What are your thoughts on teen promiscuity? Are the adults any better?
Speak your piece…
SAFE SEX BONUS
Have you been tested for an STD lately?
Go to www.STDTestExpress.com (Props to Tina)