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Did Kelis Get Too Much Child Support From Nas?

Posted by NWSO • July 28, 2009 • Printer-friendly

Back in May, I did a post on the impending divorce of Nas and Kelis and how a prenupt could have saved them some stress in the long run. Well, based on recent developments, it seems that sentiment rings truer now more than ever.

Last week—a day after Kelis gave birth to the couple’s son, Knight—an L.A. judge awarded the new mom a reported $55,000 (some reports say $44,000) in spousal and child support. Far be it for me to downplay the cost of raising a child on your own, but I must say, that’s a lot of dirty diaper money—$660,000 a year to be exact.

As a man, I might be biased, but I feel like Nas really got the short end of the stick on this one. I just don’t see how Kelis or the baby would require that much money to be provided for. I’m not saying she and the baby shouldn’t get anything, but upwards of $600,000? Sorry, no kid or wife needs that much to be “comfortable,” IMHO.

I understand that as a celebrity Kelis is used to a certain lifestyle but I don’t care how famous you are, spending $660,000 a year is ridiculous—especially in today’s economy. Besides, it’s not like Kelis is some trophy wife. She has a music career of her own (maybe not as fruitful these days but a career nonetheless); why should Nas have to foot the majority of the bill. Yeah, he’s the breadwinner, but I doubt very much that as a rapper he’s making that kinda paper.

Don’t get me wrong, child and spousal support should definitely be provided for your offspring, but there should be some sort of fairness in the figures these judges come up with. Because for Nas to be able to afford that $660,000 a year, he’s going to have to make at least twice as much ($1.3 million) to support himself. Most rappers’ careers fade after 30; Nasir is 35 and I don’t see him consistently earning $1.3 million a year in his future.

I’m not the only one that thinks the judge OD’d on child/spousal support. I was reading RapRadar.com yesterday and they posted a clip of Redman and Method Man hearing about the news during a radio interview. Their initial response: “That’s bullshit!”

Meth went on to elaborate on the topic beyond just Nas and Kelis: “If you ask me, the court system is geared [more] toward the women than the men. They not taking into consideration that…even Father’s Day. Mother’s Day is so official and what we get? But what the kids fail to realize is that that air they breathin’, the lights, the cable, the mortgage, all that fall on daddy’s shoulders Not to mention he gotta pay this [woman] that he don’t even fuck with no more to look good for some other ni**a. That shit is ridiculous and any chick that’s doing that, you dead fuckin’ wrong.”

Meth doesn’t put all the blame on the women. Later he adds: “It’s because of you deadbeat ass fathers out there that’s leaving these chicks with like nine, ten kids and they strugglin’, man.”

He doesn’t let the ladies off the hook completely, though. “You women get off that bullshit and make your own fuckin’ way. Straight up and down, talkin’ that independent woman shit but as soon as the going get tough y’all wanna hit ni**as pockets.”

Redman chimes in: “It’s about [women] makin’ you pay for your freeness, like, ‘Aiight, you wanna go out in the world? You gonna pay for this. You gonna pay to be free. Y’all need to cut that shit out because it’s about the kids.”

Red is right, but so many times warring couples focus in on “getting back” at each other instead of doing what’s best for the kids. Sadly, the best way most women find to get back at a man is through his pockets and using their child as a bargaining tool. I pray that never happens to me but this Nas and Kelis situation adds more credence to the phrase, “It’s cheaper to keep her.”

Do you think Kelis got too much in child/spousal support? Should there be a legal limit to how much a person gets in support? Should a woman still get spousal support if she makes more than her husband? Do you look down on men that actually ask for spousal support like Eric Benet and Terry McMillan’s husband? Fellas, do you feel that no matter who’s in the wrong that the legal system tends to vote in favor of the woman? Are you pro-child support but anti-spousal support? What do you think about what Meth and Red had to say on this topic? Did they have a point or were they a bit sexist and off base? How much is too much for child support?

Speak your piece…

Tagged as: child support, divorce, Kelis, Nas, prenup, spousal support

http://myspace.com/nexus_da_underdawg da ThRONe

As a male I am all for child support! But there needs to be some reason. Especially when dealing with entertainers. The problem with the system as is is it gives females way to much leeway to abuse it. Females should be forced to account for every dollars. There should be a certain amount that goes to bills but the rest should be only spent on the child and any extra should be put in an account for that child til there 18. Child support should be just that support for the child.
NicoleJvon

Child support...NO. Spousal support...YES.

9 grand for a man in the industry is fair. I don't think she should have gotten the spousal support at all. She has her own career. If they had assets to split then that 1 thing but he shoukdnt have to give her 30 something grand a month just because. That's not what's up...
http://thoughtsof100k.blogspot.com 100K

I addressed it on my blog but I definitely think she got too much. as a dude it makes me more averse to the idea of getting married ,much less without a prenup. Men really dont get benefits from marriage as is and as I said on Twitter, marrying the woman you love is a privilege. If we wanna get technical, the wifely duties of marriage are to "love, honor and obey" anyway...but thats another story.

She should get child support but spousal support? Gimme a fuckin' break here. She's a recording artist with a big following in Europe. LEt her take her ass on tour and get that $ since its what artists eat off of anyway.

The legal system is definitely in favor of the woman. No doubt about it. it's a multibillion dollar industry so there's no incentive to change it. What's wild is that a woman can cheat on you when you're married and still be entitled to half your shit.

I have female friends who are averse to the idea of signing a prenup and say that it would offend them. Gimme a break here.
bumblebee88

Do you think Kelis got too much in child/spousal support?

YES, she took him to the cleaners. This is a very bad reflection on women, we are not all gold diggers,
she does not need that much money to raise a child. My mother raised me with nothing. That
money is for her to maintain her lifestyle. Nas' pocket is hurtin because of her spite.

I do believe the amount money that a child receives should reflect the lifestyle and financial capacity of the father though. How are you going to allow your child to live a subordinate lifestyle to you? It kills me when I see these celebrities who clearly are raking it in behind on child payments. Why? No shame. If you drop your signature in a woman you better expect to be a man and look after half of your DNA (not just financially).

Should there be a legal limit to how much a person gets in support?

I do not think that there should be legal limits but I do think their should be strict guidelines.

Should a woman still get spousal support if she makes more than her husband?

NO......please, we know we can get by we have been doing it for centuries.

Do you look down on men that actually ask for spousal support like Eric Benet and Terry McMillan’s husband?

YES....how the hell are you going to ask for spousal support when you cheated on your wife? No shame.

What do you think about what Meth and Red had to say on this topic? Did they have a point or were they a bit sexist and off base?

Meth and Red definitely had a point but their delivery was misogynistic. Meth talked about his mother raising him without support from his father, and this is highly commendable (so have many) but that shit does not have to go down anymore, we live in the 21st century, the law is now there to protect us. Sure the excessiveness of the law is extreme but shit maybe it is just payback? I do believe in KARMA. Women have had go it alone for years.
bumblebee88

100K,

Kelis is not that big in Europe anymore. Her last album flopped. And, whilst working her ass on tour maybe an answer, she just might want to spend time bonding with her baby and being a good mother. Lord knows that baby will need it considering the immaturity that both parties have displayed.
http://nwso.net NWSO

@bumblebee88

Just playing devil's advocate... So being a good mother means not working? And to clarify, I am NOT discrediting child birth/rearing as work. Just saying that your statement reads that the only way to bond with your child is to not work.

Bonding is all good and I'm for it, but 55K a month is a heck of a lot of bonding.
bumblebee88

My mother worked and raised me, so to clarify I am not against that (and know plenty of women doing this). But, I am also not against not working as a mother if you do not have to. It takes a lot to raise a child and some women like to be all hands on deck, parenting is a full-time job by the way.

He he, 55K is a heck of a lot of bonding,........manicures, pedicures, shopping sprees...........................................................
Litabia

Oh wow...I have speak on this one. Child support and I guess spousal support as well is calculated based on the non-custodial parent's income. If Nas doesn't want to pay the child support tell him to seek custody of his baby. Since normally the parent taking 100% of the responsibility for the child is the mother they are the one that is paid child support. What the hell do you expect her to get for child support $200 dollars a month. Have you ever heard the old adage, "it's cheaper to keep her." I wanted to get all butt hurt over some old ass sex tape so divorce is the answer. If he wanted to avoid this from happening he should have done what Brittany Spears did to K-Fed and get a freaking pre-nup. Males just want to have no responsibility at all when kids are involved but the relationship has dwindled. I'm sorry who fucking cares how much money any of these niggas have to cash out to their baby mama's, it's not like it's my money or I'm receiving it.
http://nwso.net NWSO

@Litabia

No one said anything about $200 a month, but come one 55K is some people's salary for the year, how you gonna get that a month—especially when you're a celebrity yourself and can pull in way more than the average woman who does more with way less.

And yes, I heard of "it's cheaper to keep her" that was the last line of the post. You skimming through my work, Litabia?

SMH
Litabia

@NWSO

I didn't agree with the first paragraph so no I didn't read past Method Man and Redman talking shit. 55k is what she is getting and just like I said he can always have that amount modified believe me I had that done for my son. I paid child support when my son's dad took my son into his home to live with him. So the system is designed for the child but because normally the child is with the mom the mom gets the check. My cousin has to pay her husband hella money in spousal support because she made more money then him but that just for half the time that they were married so the spousal support is temporary. But I know females alike that pays a butt load in child support as well. Just like I said the calculate based on the non-custodial parent' income and expenses. Apparently, that's the amount that was calculated by the courts.
http://thoughtsof100k.blogspot.com 100K

SMFH.

No Prenup, no marriage

No pussy is that tight, no face that pretty, no love that deep.
http://nwso.net NWSO

@Litabia

Well like I wrote I doubt that Nas, a rapper who doesn't even go gold anymore, can afford $660,000 a year in child support. The kid is not even a week old yet and he's worth over 2 million by two?

Meth also said in the video link that $5,000 is a month is more than enough to hold a baby down. Anything beyond that is overkill. This is Nas we're talking about not Bill Gates.
ms.nina

there are men in the world who receive child and spousal support, but its just not as prominent as it is when women receive it. Obviously for the judge to rule to give her that kind of money he's showing something on paper that backs up that he can afford it...I'm not saying that Kelis really needs that much money to raise their child, but I'm sure the judgment is not without merit...
bumblebee88

@NWSO

But isn't child support estimated by the father's income?

Nas has had an illustrious career. He is not pulling in paper like Jay Z but he ain't no pauper. He must earn enough money through royalties.
http://nwso.net NWSO

@bumblebee88

I don't know the specifics of how the judge came to that number and sure he probably gets royalties for something. But I still doubt very much that Nas is pulling the money yearly and consistently to afford 660k a year. Like I said/wrote he;d have to be making at least twice that. So he has to be making $1.3 million a year? Doubt that very much.

Maybe the judge missed a decimal space
http://myspace.com/kobe81fan Shay from L.A. (Los Angeles)

I keep reading that the legal system is in favor of women, this is not true. The legal system is in favor of whomever makes more money. For example, Mo'nique, Sherry Sheppard and Halle Berry ALL had to pay spousal support after their divorces.

I'm not saying that the amount of money is fair, but the reason women get that amount of money for child support is because the court believes that the child should not have to live a down-graded lifestyle because the parents are no longer together. We can speculate all we want about the fairness of the amount, but by law (at least in CA) the court cannot give a child support settlement for more than 30% of the non-custodial parent's yearly income.

Forget cheaper to keep her...it's cheaper to leave her on the shelf.
Sistahjo

Child support, yes. Spousal support, NO. What's wrong with working for a living? In the UK, the govt wants to change the law so cohabiting couples get the same rights as married couples. So if you've been living with someone for more than 2 years, the higher earning partner will have to provide support. I personally think that is unadulterated BS!!!! The reason why the govt wants to change the law is to protect women who've been in common law relationships and end up with nothing when it breaks down cos the house etc was in his name. What we need to do is educate women on their rights and not change the law. I would definitely have second thoughts about living with someone.
http://www.brandonsaintrandy.wordpress.com Brandon St. Randy

Nas shoulda got a better lawyer
Jennifer

I personally don't give two sh*ts about the personal affairs of people I don't know, celebrity or average Joe. I also don't let other folks' messy business impact my judgement or opinions about anything. In this case it's the sanctity of marriage, divorce, and child support.

BUT to say that the judgement was excessive would be an understatement. No, you cannot put a number on the cost of being a mother, but it doesn't take that much to support a child. Especially now, since he doesn't do anything but eat, sleep, and sh*t. You could wrap him in a burlap bag and he wouldn't even know that it wasn't 1500 thread count Egyptian sheets.

I always viewed child support as something set in place if the father failed to own up to his responsibilities. I know there are divorced/broken up parents who don't even have child support set in place because the father is there for his kid(s) and supports them financially, without a judge telling him to do so. I could understand if Nas was on some deadbeat dad ish, but he hasn't even been given a chance to exercise his fatherly duties. Even so, 55K is crazy. I'm glad I'm not involved!
Mark B. Esq.

And let's see if the tables were turned???

Nuff Said...
Elle

For him to have to pay that kind of monthly amount, he must have provided enough relevant infos on his earnings/income/assets etc. Just cause he isn't going plat or gold anymore with his music, he may very well be having other sources of cash flow.

The system isn't in favor of the women but in favor of the one who raises the child and/or has the smaller income. My mom who is now retired has to pay my dad money every month because he never managed to accumulate enough in retirement funds. While she was the one who raised me by herself without any financial support from him, when they finally got a divorce the court ruled that a certain amount would automatically be deducted from her monthly retirement check and go to his ass.

How's that for fair?

I have no sympathy for a fool who was too sprung to get a prenup and apparently has enough money to be able to afford 55K every month in child support.
irish_mami8

Sorry to play devil's advocate, but maybe they figured, let her get the money while his career is still going. You said yourself that he's getting old for a rapper. The only way I can see this making any sort of sense is that she gets that for a while, and when things start drying up, she gets less and has to live on her savings if she can't make her own money.

However, I think that $55,000 a month is crazy. I could be more than comfortable on that much a year. Not that I'm a golddigger, but with my deadbeat ex, when I hear numbers like that, I think I married the wrong man. Well, like money has anything to do with it. But I tell you, a check that size, would make his BS a lot easier to deal with.
http://www.intromagonline.com aaviana

I think it is ridiculous for her to receive that much in child and spousal support. I think the judge did not determine a need and a want for her or anyone receive ridiculous amounts in child support. To go on shopping sprees and trips to the spa every week is a want and not a need. She should know how to live on less because she used to be homeless!
Simone

Being a mother & having experienced a difficult divorce I speak from a place of experience. I don't see how it could possibly cost 55k per month to care for the Jacksons brood let alone one child. The sight of who is supposed to be supported here has been lost in the conflict.

I agree EVERY parent should be held responsible for his/her child (cause there are deadbeat moms too) but I feel more defining factors need to come into play when considering spousal support. I agree if it is one spouses job throughout a significant period in the marriage (10-20yrs) is to stay at home then when divorce rears it's ugly head equitable support should be assessed. To get a disgusting amount of money because "you married" someone is ridiculous. I just pray that within this award the court has required the former Mrs. Jones to save or invest some of that money she's getting for when the child grows up.
http://michiganhiphop.com Ketchums

I wholeheartedly agree with Meth and Red. To put it into perspective, there are single parents out there who live an entire *year* on a salary of $50,000. And Kelis is still a popular musician, who is actually getting publicity in magazines through photo shoots, etc. I've heard she has a project on the way, too. I used to hate the phrase "cheaper to keep her," but it makes sense here - if you're going to pay for a family's income, you might as well pay for someone you're with.

But I'll acknowledge that due to me not ever having been married, and not knowing many families that have went through divorce, a lot of the ins and outs of divorce court have seemed like bullshit to me.
Angeleyes

I think that is a ridiculous amount of money! A newborn costs $600K a year?!?! I know adults with multiple children that live off less than a tenth of what she's getting!! If they can make it work, Kelis needs to too! It's awful how these celebs squander money with the rest of the world struggles. That was pure get-back on Kelis' part. It wasn't about the child or her needs I bet. Just terrible....
http://twitter.com/chocopina chocopina

i think i read somewhere that nas is paying more than diddy and some other higher profile, deeper pocket black male celebrities. which doesn't make sense. i do think its kind of ridiculous that he is paying that much.

but i don't know the whole story on what actually went down, or what agreements they had before the divorce regarding children. if the agreement was that she would become a stay at home mom and not work anymore, then yeah she should get something. if that wasn't the agreement, i think she should have to go and get a job like most other single mothers out there. yeah nas should pay child support, and it could be argued he is the higher wage earner but she should also own some financial responsibility.

maybe if he was pulling an eddie murphy and not claiming the kid and not trying to see the baby i could justify the money. making him pay for being an absent father. or if he forced her to have his baby (not sure how that would have happened) and she didn't want kids and then they got divorced. but i don't think either of those situations are applicable in this case.

again i don't know what happened between them, and i don't know how hard they tried to make things work but i wouldn't be so quick to divorce my husband while i was pregnant. if for no other reason than i'd be hormonally imbalanced and my decision making would be skewed. lol.
artsyheartsy

Hmmm.
While I will venture that it is true that all of us here probably live on far less than she was awarded they don't pick numbers out of thin air. The number is attached to documented expenses and income.

When you start breaking it down, it is not that much money in the grand scheme of money having folks. It puts a person with a child in the upper, upper middle class but not more than that. I just googled 3 br apts (kid, Kelis, nanny so she can go back to work...) for sale in Manhattan and chose as my model an apartment in a condo (who wants to deal with a coop board when your ex is a rap star?) in the comfortable but not overly trendy upper west side. It was not the cheapest bottom price for a 3br in the listings but at $5.5 million it was less than half the price of the bottom 3br in the most expensive listing... According to my quick and dirty use of the online mortgage calculator her mortgage alone at 5.5% over 30 years is $31,228.40 or nearly 57% of the monthly support award if the higher figure is to be believed a whopping 71% if the lower figure is accepted. Owning a place in Manhattan is still doable for sure but with that amount of money she won't be living at the top of the market by any stretch. She will need to look very much in the middle... Now, add taxes and maintenance. Add the nanny. Add tuition in a couple of years. Add medical insurance. Add college savings. Add retirement savings. Add groceries. Add transportation. Subtract what she is not earning due to pregnancy and maternity leave (should she be good with 12 weeks? 6 months? A year? Two?). Try to add fly gear and luxurious vacations... Not so much left for that.

Is $55,000 (or even $44,000) a month more than enough to live on? Sure it is. But frankly it isn't nearly enough to maintain an excessively flashy existence. My guess is that based on what he has earned in recent years and how they have lived it reflects some compromises on her side and some sacrafices on his but nothing close to a catastrophic bloodletting.
emotionalfunk

well no I don't think it's ridiculous at all and she is not getting 55,000 a month she's getting 55,000 temporaraily for a month or two. There is a reason the judge set that temporary amount and we're not in the know of the thier private matters so it is what it is. Who knows what kind of debt has accumulated since his absence that needs to be handled. The final stipulation will be a different amount and I do think a parent should get spousal support whether its a man or woman who keeps the child and I do know a couple of house-husbands to so it can go either way.

I don't really don't care that 55,000 is a lot lot more than I have a year but I don't understand why a parent doesn't wan't thier child to have a similar lifesyle/surroundings than them. I mean forget about the mother/father gets to live in it too, what do you expect the child to raise themself? Thats just idiotic.

A child should be home with its mother the first few years or father, whichever. A child needs that and not the daycare that we've got so accustomed to just because you or I had it and we came out okay. It makes a huge difference and many educators can tell tell the difference and it does effect the child. Let the child have that carefree life his other parent has and all the benefits like I think all children should like mommy and me classes, dance, music, camp, a great kids room being able to travel and visit relatives no matter where they are and build stong family ties just like they would if the parents where together and even a nanny ( I used to be one to) when it gets to be to heavy at times and it does. Its just to sad when people keep focusing on dollars instead of the kids do we really need another f'd up kid in the world lashing out saying daddy/mama don't care about me becuase he steps out of an apartment to a mansion every weekend or daddy buys me fly ass gear buy mama/daddy says no I can't go here because daddy is nickel and diming mama and makes her argue for a dollar for the extras or they gotta beg and prove and put up with, all you ask me for is money excuse.

True enough money is freedom and one parent giving up enough eliminates control over the other and one parent having favor because they give them more or even controlling the parent through money. I'm just glad its not another poor kid in the world.
sweetsexxybrown

IMHO when it comes to most child support cases the judge rules in favor of the woman. So this is not shocking at all. I know many upstanding men who have tried to gain custody of the child but the court ruled no, because they want the child to stay with the mom for the most part, unless she has housing/drug probs. But what is shocking is the 660k a year. That's f**kin insane, straight up and down. I don't believe in spousal support. That's some BS. When you have 2 incomes or not and the marriage is over, be fiscally responsible and stop trying to live the life you had from 2 incomes. Just because you are 'used to' a certain lifestyle doesn't mean u should have to maintain it. How about maintaining your bills, making sure you have enuff to eat and shelter for you and yours. If you want anything above and beyond that, work for it or get it with your own dough. When it comes 2 the kid, that's another story. The kid should be taken care of. If Nas feels that this 55k a month is too much he can try and fight it. Not sure how well that would go.
http://nwso.net NWSO

@artsyheartsy

I think this quote is most fitting for your comment and calculations:

"I DON'T BELIEVE YOU, YOU NEED MORE PEOPLE."

LOL

Nah, I hear what your saying with those numbers and I'll admit again that I don't know Nas' finances, but I wonder (rhetorically) would they be spending 55k a year if they were still together?
artsyheartsy

I have been a single parent for 18 years. I have had no formal child support arrangements and my child's father "provided" for him but I am sure that I have come up short in terms of my longterm financial health by not going through the courts. While I don't expect to be a cat food eating old lady, I know that I will most likely be a hard working, no retirement having old lady. Such are the costs of playing nice...
Mz. Ashley

WTF is wrong with some of you people? I dont care whose child it is, $55K a month is too much for anyone! Nas hasnt even dropped a Cd lately and i am sure this is going to be tough to keep up for him. Kelis just wanted to be a bitch and hang there son over his head, which a lot of women do these days. Why do you women play with your kids emotions? that is so selfish and unfair to the child! Now we see why he left your ass hangin Kelis! She is not disabled, so she can go out and make her own money....she is hurting so she wants Nas to hurt.

Method Man and Red Man are so right...Kelis could have done just fine with $15,000 a month..that is still a lot but atleast it is reasonable.

The only way i believe in spousal support is if the spouse was not able to work during the marriage because of diablity or either the mate didnt want the spouse to work, then they should get spousal support....other than that, you need to fend for yourself.
pbvirtue

how much is his other kid and her mother getting a month?
http://www.nubiamag.com Cari

Damn didn't know NAS had it like that to even kick-out 55,000 p/mth....People are in la la land to not think a prenup is important to cover your ass. You can still love someone but be realistic that 52% of most marriages breakup. A prenup doesn't project doom in a relationship but shows that you are mature enough to make the best decisions for your finances should your marriage end.

Yes, I think she did get too much but not all women are out for a man's pockets and if you can't conjugate a damn sentence do not talk about the issue at hand. For the record, women have had to deal with taking care of their own damn children keeping the lights on, putting food on the table, dealing with the everyday, OK so you write a check every month but for a lot of men that's all they do. If he has a problem with the amount of money he has to pay, appeal or shut the F-up!
distinguishedgentlewoman

I think we tend to base our assessment of celeb money situations based on our (or the working-man's) financial status. We don't know how much Nas is worth. Just because he's not going gold today does not mean he's not worth a pound of gold from past record sales and investments. I'm sure the judge didn't come up with that figure out of the air. For me living my simple lifestyle---sans maids and nanny salaries to pay, expensive homes with hefty mortgages, personal assistants and accountants with six-figure salaries, and the average celeb lifestyle---that is a lot of money. But for folks like Nas and Kelis, who are used to a certain lifestyle, they often spend that kinda money without even thinking about it.
http://myspace.com/nexus_da_underdawg da ThRONe

@100K

Back to this again if your love isnt deep dont get married. Pre-nups are the dumbest things I ever heard! If you dont trust that person with everything dont get married its that simple. He is a grown ass man who throw his marriage away for nothing. He makes more money and isnt going have custody so he needs to pay. Those are the rules you dont like'em dont play! Do I think that number is fair no and I do think who ever is drawing the check(for child support) should be forced to make sure that income is spent on that child and any extra after bills should go on that child. Not new outfits, vacations or some other nigga/hoe.
jeez

I have yet to hear Nas complain about this arrangement with the exception of him offering her $5000, instead of the $9000 per month in child support. If he's not upset with it, then why should anyone else be. As someone mentioned you can't put a price tag on raising a child--particularly raising a newborn, and raising it alone. If he is living well, the mother and the child should as well. And spousal support is only temporary--usually not lasting more than a year. It often helps women who have forsaken their own careers to help their husbands (and vice versa) which happens often when one spouse's career is taking off. It is particularly helpful in cases like this when a newborn baby is involved and pregnancy could have possibly prevented her from touring, as someone suggested. (I worked when I was pregnant but I was often sick and it was horrible.) My mother stayed home with me for the first two years of my life, nursing me and bonding with me, taking me to museums, etc., and taking care of my father. Its an experience that I still remember today and so I gave up my own career for a few years when I had my children (at the urging of my husband who also agreed that the babies would be cared for best by their mother and that nursing (which is a 24-hour job) would be the healthiest option for our babies. Other countries provide for women for the first two years of their baby's life--some have paid maternity leave for TWO years which makes sense (most babies are nursed for one to two years). I could not have lived with myself if I had to turn over my children to a daycare and have them drink formula because I wanted to make some extra dollars and continue my career. It's amazingly hard to get back into the work force after having a baby and staying home (tho I did it). But often times employers look at you negatively for the time lapse on your resume and they really look at single women skeptically because they know they will often have to take time off from work for sick children, etc. Not to mention, women STILL do not earn the same amount as men for performing the same jobs. It's called leveling the playing field. I'm not rich and famous, so I am unfamiliar with those dollar amounts. But if he were making $30,000 a year I don't think anyone would care. It's not excusable to say so many women have done it for so much less. That's a shame that they had to. I know women who had children in the 70s before these laws were enacted who literally sacrificed their lives to raise their children alone while their ex-husbands thrived in their careers without the burden of child-rearing. One woman, my mother-in-law, lives in the projects. Her ex-husband, who didn't pay a dime to her in child support made over a million dollars last year. Its the saddest shit. She gave up her life and her job, to help him start his business and he left her for another woman and left her with two kids to raise on her own. Sad.
I think men should commend Nas for taking care of his family. Because that's what they will be forever. The mother of his child and his child are HIS FAMILY.
neo the one

@ pbvirtue- I dont know either. but you know whats gonna happen? his other baby momma is gonna go back to court seeking more dough..... its happened to puff and several others....

As far as child support- its more of a business than for the child- how much of that supposed child support income is going directly to the child?> the parent getting that is putting some of that money in their pockets for sure... not all but i can guarranttee you alot of em are.... money should be allocated into a trust fund when its in excess liek that for the child to have @ when they turn 18....... the other proposal... custodial parents should have to produce reciepts showing where this money is going- its a start

spousal support? well if you're worth millions when you are about to get married you shouldn't be so punch drunk in love to know you need to protect yourself!! nothing is forever!! love, money, nothing........ now if you become rich together, i can understand an issue with that: he or she ws there before the money and should be entitled to the pay- but NAS? my brother why? and for those of you ( men or women who are wealthy that say they dont want a prenup....... be prepared to lighten the load in the monetary and ownership dept) like chris rock once said: if you got millions and she take 1/2.... you're still a millionare....... but if you making 30,000 and she takes 1/2... might have to kill the B!! lol
CJS Inc.

He didn't give her enough. You can't put a dollar amount on a woman having your child and then having to raise that child herself. He should give her everything!!!
http://nwso.net NWSO

@CJS Inc.

No you can't put a dollar amount on a child etc. But giving there's no reason he should give HER everything!!! He should give his CHILD everything, as well as his other child. People (not you necessarily) always say the mom should get everything when the focus should be the child's need. yes she's the caretaker until child comes of age, but SOME women seem to lose sight of that in mission to get back at the daddy that did mommy wrong.

Oh, and he didn't get a chance to give anything, the judge ordered him to. Who's to say that he wasn't going to care for his child in the first place?
http://myspace.com/nexus_da_underdawg da ThRONe

@CJS Inc.

You are just talking crazy now! I am pro child support and I think it should be mandatory for anybody who doesnt have atleast joint custody of the kid. But there is only some much of that money that going toward the kids. And not until the law starts auditing the person getting the child support.

There is no way she should get everything under no circumstance. The awarding is more than enough for her to provide for her and that baby. A baby shouldnt give somebody the right to retire.
jeez

is there something wrong with him taking care of his FAMILY? the mother of his child and the child? i dont understand why the men are so angry at the woman? as if she's stealing his dough. as if that's really important when you have a baby. if there was no mother, wouldn't you want anyone who was taking care of your child, if you couldn't, to be as comfortable as possible so that the focus can be on the child? anybody who has had a single mother raise them knows how that can affect a child--seeing your mother stressed out and not being able to realize her dreams because she sacrificed her life, while your father flourishes financially but doesn't know you from a can of paint. i would venture to say that many of the men on this post are being materialistic. is the money--no matter how much--really important when you're talking about a WOMAN and a CHILD? SAD.
http://nwso.net NWSO

@jeez

I don't think anyone is saying that a woman (Kelis or other) shouldn't get financial support (maybe someone did but I know I didn't:) but in this particular case i think some (myself included) are looking at the 660k a year as a bit excessive. Again, that's not to say there's is a price tag on a child, but most folks (and I know Nas & Kelis aren't "most folks") could live their entire life quite comfortably off 660k, so to hear someone get that for a year sounds astronomical, IMHO
Striggs

Divorce should always be “no fault”. (doesn’t matter the reasons of why in court)

- If he had money before they got married… after the divorce that money and land should be his not hers (the same if the shoe was on a woman's foot).

- If all they have was obtained after they got married, should be 50-50.

- If a child is involved, whoever takes care of the kid should receive child support from the other party.

- There should not be any alimony. (unless the person they got married with gets in some terrible accident and is not eligible to work anywhere) People are different individuals, you need to take care of yourself and get a job.

Now remember folks this is my opinion. It's not better than anyone's opinion, but it just might make more sense LOL...

One word to men AND women out there getting money: PRENUP.

@Brandon St Randy - I agree with you; Nas should have gotten a better lawyer lol.
http://myspace.com/nexus_da_underdawg da ThRONe

Pren-ups are some pussy ass shit. Be man or woman enough to say "I dont know what you are capable of so I will not marry you"! And see where that gets you. Trust is the must important thing in a marriage and a prenup is the biggest "I dont trust you bitch" the law allows. Thats like hiring a P.I. to follow him/her around just in case right. Thats bullshit! If you dont feel said person is worth half your stash(or alimony payments) dont marry them plain and simple!
jeez

@nwso
if you had it and giving someone that much money to take care of yr child wouldn't affect your lifestyle, wouldn't you give it? what if the mother of your child died and you had to pay someone to care for your child as if they were its mother. wouldn't you want the caretaker and child to at least have the same lifestyle as you? particularly if the caretaker is caring for YOUR child 24 hours 365? If you don't why not? That speaks volumes about selfishness. if you do, you would do it for a stranger, but not for the biological mother of your child. huh?

keep in mind that spousal support is temporary--usually a year. kids need around the clock care for the first two years of their life until they are ready for school..and even then...
http://myspace.com/nexus_da_underdawg da ThRONe

@Ladies

I think your giving yourself a lil to much credit! I dont know Kelis from a hole in the wall or her moral beliefs but im sure her spoiled ass will hire a nanny that will do most of the work anyways!

As a dude my responsibilty is to my child not her. And whos to say Nas wont be a great DAD anyways? Maybe even a better parent then Kelis?(just throwing the question out there). Why should she be on easy street til her child is 18? If he's going be apart of his kids life. I think each situation is different and should be judge as such.
http://nwso.net NWSO

@Jeez

If the mother of my child died (and we were divorced etc), I would imagine the child would be with me not some random caretaker. So I can't really speak on that or see a reason why a caretaker would be necessary for me and MY child. I'll be the one taking care. Wait, unless you mean a babysitter or something when you say caretaker, if that's the case it's still the same you watch kid while I'm at work and he/she comes home with me. I know daycare is expensive but not 55k for me as a non celeb at least.

And I'm not saying anything against paying for your child should parents split or that if I got it my kid won't. It's just as a normal guy those numbers sound high to me. Basically the kid is making a working class salary a month.

I'm not familiar with spousal support, never been married, divorced or into specifics with anyone that's been down that rose, so I assumed it was a lifetime bid as well. So thanx for that clarity. And I also can imagine scenarios where spousal support could be necessary, just not necessarily in case where it's two celebrities with viable careers. Just like when Eric Benet wanted Halle's money.
Striggs

@da ThRONe - I disagree with you, but you are more than entitled to your opinion.

And prenups have nothing to do with hiring a P.I. A prenup is a good business decision. I did say that whatever is obtained during the marriage should be split 50/50 so I do not know where you are coming from.
http://myspace.com/nexus_da_underdawg da ThRONe

@Striggs

That mindset is everything that is wrong with our society! Marriage is not designed to be a business deal. If all you care about is your money do like all rappers say and marry it instead. If the first thing your worried about before getting married is "If this bitch is lying what can I do to keep my money" why get married in the first place?
Mr Mecc

The arguments for Kelis leave out the fact that:
1) Together they had 5 homes, the judge could easily give her 1 or 2 so no rent needs be paid...
2) Why shouldn't SHE have to work to help support THEIR child? People are acting like he held a gun to her head to have the baby. When did a child become a "get-out-of-work-free" card?
3) Keep in mind, when you support trife behavior, even by making light of it with a joke or dismissive you make it hard for us guys to trust you.
http://nwso.net NWSO

Oh, and let's not forget when all this started Kelis was reported to have made a toast at a party and said “Here’s to taking that muthafucka for everything he has!”

http://www.nakedwithsockson.com/2009/05/04/would-you-sign-a-prenup-the-divorce-of-nas-kelis/
jeez

@nswo, maybe that wasnt the ideal hypothetical. I was trying to imagine if--like Nas right now who is on tour now for the summer and supposed to embark on a year-long international tour after that--if you were living in a separate place and paying someone to take care of your newborn by themselves 24-7-365. anyway, too weird a hypothetical to imagine for the average working person, so point taken.

but here's a personal story too that may help folks to think of it differently. My mother left my father for another man when I was in high school. My father and I lived in the pj's and my mother and her new man lived in an apartment, but on a nicer side of town. my parents were still friendly--had been friends and dated since 7th grade--so there was no court, no child support, etc. my mother never paid him anything--at least not to my knowledge. my father worked two jobs and as a teenage girl, i was often raising myself. i never spent the night at my mother's apartment, though she was still very much involved in my life. still i remember when I went over there I would feel resentful--specifically because she lived in a nicer apartment and had nice stuff, while I came home to piss in the elevator, crazy people, etc. in all actuality, their incomes probably weren't that much different. But in a child's eye, even in this case since I was a teenager, perception is everything. To me, she was rich and we were suffering.
this is an unusual scenario. more often, its the other way around--where its the woman and the child who suffers. but perhaps it will make people--particularly guys--look at the scenario through the eyes of the child.
jeez

@ Mr. Mecc,
In an ideal situation wouldn't you want your newborn to be cared for by its mother rather than a stranger in daycare? As i mentioned, in some countries maternity leave is 2 years--the amount of time a child should be nursed by the mother. i have been a stay-at-home mother and a full-time worker with two jobs. Staying at home with a newborn was WORK, a job that you can't take a long lunch break from. Much harder than any "real" job I've had.
http://myspace.com/nexus_da_underdawg da ThRONe

@jeez

Like I pointed out. Nas might cut the check and his child may still end up being raisied by a nanny. So how is that fair to him? And thats my point if the government can force you to pay then they should force that other person to do the right thing as well.
Striggs

@da ThRONe - that is the way you define marriage. And you are more in your right to do so. I believe that there is a balance. Money is involved and that's a fact of life. I actually said nothing about "a bitch lying." Those words never came out of my mouth. So I don't understand what you mean by that. I just said if you're getting your money you need to consider a prenup. Plain and simple. You disagree with that and that's cool, but saying I "should marry my money like rappers say" to me is an asinine statement in my opinion, but I digress. I respect your opinion. I just disagree.
Semora Howell

I wish that the judge hadn't ruled in Kelis' favor. She didn't even deserve half of what she's gotten. Nas has always been an artist who made the attempt to keep his private life, private. I read yesterday that Kelis alleged that Nas cheated, but long before that someone came forward to Nas ans said they had a sex tape of Kelis. Kelis was not repentant or apologetic about this and was even more determined to "gold-dig" Nas. She was even photographed toasting "taking Nas for all he's worth". Straight up and down I believe that Kelis is a whore and Nas made a mistake and now he's paying for it in more ways than one. Child and spousal support shoudl depend solely on length of the relationship and what each person has brought to the table at the time of the court date. What Nas has been ordered to pay is unnecessarily exorbitant.
jeez

@ da Throne--True. Maybe. But sometimes having a nanny if you're a single parent doesn't necessarily mean they will be raising the kid. It just means you're getting some much needed help. I don't know homegirl, so I can't speak on it.
I'm not judging either one of their characters cause I am not in the relationship, I'm just making the point that the law is the way it is for a reason. And Nas shouldn't be looked at as sucker that got took, he should be looked at as a good dude thats gonna go above and beyond what any parent would do for their child and the child's mother--financially and otherwise.
http://myspace.com/nexus_da_underdawg da ThRONe

@Striggs

Have you ever read the vows couples recite at marriages? Because when you agree to love somebody despite everything else forever God forbide you actually have to honor those words. If you dont wanna honor them dont get married. I think that is a simple as it gets. We live in a time were we dont feel the need to honor our word and thats where the cowardness comes in IMO. You cant have it both ways either you care more about the money or the person. If its the person then get married and what ever happens happen. If its the money dont put it in jeopardy at all in the first place and dont get married!
jeez

@ da Throne. I think we agree. I think there's been a breakthrough in the gender war!
Striggs

@da ThRONE - I agree with people not honoring their commitments, but I also believe that there are circumstances where carrying on the relationship is not feasible. I do agree with you on that point. I still think prenups should be considered, but I respect your opinion and understand your stance.
http://myspace.com/nexus_da_underdawg da ThRONe

@Striggs

When Im in a relationship if I cant tell my girl I did something thats my way of knowing I shouldnt be doing it. I think its the same way with marriage. If I cant feel comfrontable marrying a shorty without a prenup I probably shouldnt marry her. A union is doomed if you are planning its demise before it even starts. If Mrs. Striggs isnt worth half your bank than she isnt worth marrying. And If you believe no chick is worth half then that should be your mindset on marriage it just isnt worth it.
Striggs

@da ThRONe - Understandable. I just sympathize with those who are in a position of great wealth and power while trying to gauge the true sincerity of a person's intentions.
http://myspace.com/nexus_da_underdawg da ThRONe

@Striggs

More money more problems! I feel sorry for the dude that cant get a chick cause hes broke(ME) LMAO! I understand but in most cases you kinda know whos with you and why and like most people in a position of wealth they dont care. Most people with wealth marry for beauty so how is that better than marrying for money?
YoungJay

WTH is up with all these women saying ''Nas shoulda had a pre-nup''...Yall know if we ask yall to sign a pre-nup yall gonna look @ us with the side eye!
sankore

I think she should not get spousal support because she still has earning potenial as an artist. As far as the child support goes, that is way too much. I think she is still hurt over the situation and wants Nas to pay in the pockets. Is that fair? No. It is suppose to be about the child and no child needs 55k a month. I think child support should be for folks who have shown that they are not helping to take care of their child. If Nas is supporting his older daughter why wouldnt he support his son? Plus she didnt even allow him to be in the delivery room while his was being born! girlfreind is playing games and she needs to grow up. The two of them could have settled how things would be taken care of concerning the child with out getting the courts involved. Plus I am quite sure Kelis has money on the side saved up, if not, that was a bad move.

Just my two cents
sankore

@ YoungJay

Yeah you are right with the side eye lol.

But some women would actually sign a pre-nup as long as there aint no shit in the game.

Just my two cents
litrisha

Ok so look here....LOL The guy should be more than willing to pay WHATEVER for child support, but spousal support-idk. Spousal support is not as important as child support....just my opinion. Also it's important to be organized about who's going to do what before disaster strikes, that's why I say communication is key and I can't stress that enough. If guys knew how to communicate from the beginning then they wouldn't have that dumb expression on there face when it's time to go to court......just my opinion.
Jenn Perez

From my understanding (and I may know more in a few weeks when I do the child support thing).. the monetary support received is based on the father's income. That being said, Nas and Kelis could have also come to an out of court agreement but its obvious that it didn't happened, so the courts set the amount for them. As far as Kelis being a golddigger?? Not sure, but Nas was definitely more famous and had more bread than her from the jump ~ so I'm sure he knew what he was getting into..
I think child support is meant for irresponsible non custodial parents- out of court arrangements are accepted by court systems. Sometimes (as it is in my case) it is easier to go to court than deal with the irresponsible baby parent. The court determines the amount- if homeboy/girl doesnt show up and the financials cannot be retrieved, they get set at minimum. Payments don't come- license gets suspeneded..continues delinquent .. warrant goes out etc. etc.
Alimony I would take on a case by case basis BUT if one party has wayyyyyyyyy more money than the other party then why not!?!?! But im not sure because I haven't married a millionair and vice versa!
DragonFly

People here keep saying that Nas did not have the opportunity to be a father and show whether he would step up without the courts being involved. However, it was well publicized (unfortunately for them) that he did not support her during her pregnany which is an indicator of his intentions and the level of support he's WILLING to give. She was not able to work during pregnancy due to the nature f the work she does. That's who he chose to marry. Should she have to pay for all of those expenses alone because he wanted the marriage to end? I don't think so.

A mother becomes that at conception. Men seem to the think the child (and their needs) begin at birth. She had medical expenses, preparations for the child's arrival, etc. that needed to be paid for and he did not help. I'm sure some of this money is intended to help with the things that he did not do during the pregnancy. Have you ever heard loving couples say things like "we're pregnant"? That's because women don't get pregnant alone and that impending birth is immediately the responsibility of both parents.

She will not continue to receive this entire amount, though the child support (a small portion of the total) should not drop unless his income does. I don't think it is excessive, nor do I think we have all of the story/details to make an assessment about what the "right" amount should be. If a man/woman makes 50,000 a year and is ruled to pay 500 a month, is this excessive as well?

I know a man who refuses to get a "straight" job and claims unemployment because he want's to ditch the 200/mo that he's supposed to pay, while the mother tried to stay out of court for the first 7 years and he's never helped with anything (which forced her to court).
Lonias

SMH...that's all...
Ms_Philadelphia

As a mom who recieves child support and spousal support... Im in total agreement with the court awarding Kelis both... but the amount I do not agree with. That, in my oppinion, is excessive.

I personally use the court to my advantage, simply b/c my "ex-baby-daddy" (lol) is not an active memeber of his childrens lives. Should the situation be different, I would never ever have involved the courts. It is previous history that dictates outcomes of today.

I was awarded what I asked for... and when he was missing on his payments, the courts doubled the payments... and I had to admit myself... there is no way he can afford this, but its trifling behavior that dictates future outcomes. It allows women to have the upper hand... and unfortunately can allow women to abuse the system.

Hopefully Nas will be a fully participating parent and his financial obligations to Kelis will end. She is capable of supporting herself in the same manner she was accustomed to... Only time will tell what happens to them.
knappi

DragonFly hit it right on the head. We are talking about someone who wouldn't even buy his baby a crib and pay for his child's medical bills.

And we expect him all of a sudden to become an upstanding father?

The court obviously took his past behavior as well as his earned income into consideration.

They had 5 houses...clearly, Nas is still making money off of Illmatic, cause somebody had to be paying those mortgages.

55K is plenty. If Nas don't like it, then he is more than welcome to file for joint or primary custody.

Meth and Red need to stay out of other GROWN folks business and focus on their shit. Don't they got a couple of kids between the two of them? All they need to be concerned with is that their 5K a month child support payments get to the bank on time cause that last cd they had didn't do too hot...
Elle

*claps for Da Throne's views on marriage*

It's really that simple.
Dc Man with a Plan

Damn, I was out and look at all the polarizing comments THIS topic brought forth...lmao...WOW! Another fine example of the difference between the sexes. As a person who has gone through divorce court.....I can tell you that BOTH parents income are considered and evaluated when determining how much child support is to be paid by the non-custodial parent. And in places where you can have joint custody--you essentially have to have the child for 4 days and nights EVERY week, to be considered 'joint' in custody, which in turn reduces your financial outlay, but it can be difficult to sustain. And it is real easy to 'pad' the numbers, add in shyt that is difficult to dispute bcuz it's based on forecasted calculations, so yeah, yo-azz can DEFINITELY be taken to the cleaners--if the custodial parent is so inclined.....
Momof3

I read Nas' first childs mothers book and he's a dead beat! Kelis knows that and she's getting what she can now... She watched him walk away from his first child with no problem and she's just protecting hers. I understand that 55K is a lot of money but there's no way I would allow my child to walk around in reeboks and wal-mart clothes while daddy rocks the latest. SORRY! If men would talk to their dead beat friends, brothers, cousins, uncles, etc and get them to do the right thing then we as women wouldn't always feel like the courts are our last options. I'm supposed to be getting 500 a month from a first childs father but he claims he can only afford 150. And since I don't really need his money I let it ride but BELIEVE me that if times EVER got hard I'm going to get mine and every penny of it...
http://www.randomrhymereason.blogspot.com Jazzy

The answer lies in how much does Nas make? Because that's how the child support payments are supposed to be allocated..based on %age of parent's income. Kid's gotta eat. If Nas doesn't wanna pay, his son can live with him full-time.
Aztec

*shows late pass*

Anyway, I say YES to child support, but with fairness, and more importantly LIMITS. I don't care how anyone tries to rationalize it, 600 some odd thousands a year for a BABY is entirely too much.

Period.

And how much Nas makes is irrelevant. It should be scaled, like say for example (completely off the top of my head) if he makes six digits plus a year, then cap child support at 50k yearly (<-- arbitrary number).

And a double HELL NO to spousal support. If we're divorced, to me that should mean just that.

We shouldn't have anything to do with each other anymore. We split up the assets 50/50 and go our separate ways. Why the hell should someone be paying you to NOT be in their life?

And if you do the knowledge, the family court system is most definitely slanted in favor of women. In addition to exorbitant support costs, look at all the dudes who are paying child support for kids that aren't even theirs. But by all means try the "but your honor I trusted her and she cheated" defense, and let me know how that works out for you.
http://www.randomrhymereason.blogspot.com Jazzy

"And how much Nas makes is irrelevant."

Obviously, you're ignorant of the law bc that's EXACTLY how child support is figured.
http://nwso.net NWSO

@Jazzy

I think Aztek meant in his opinion it shouldn't matter not what the actual laws are.
http://www.randomrhymereason.blogspot.com Jazzy

NWSO:

The "should's" of regular citizens' opinions have no place in reality of the court system. "Period."

Some men get so worked up about the "should's" which makes me laugh bc they SHOULD be getting a good lawyer.
http://nwso.net NWSO

@Sassy Jazzy

SMH
http://www.randomrhymereason.blogspot.com Jazzy

@NWSO

SMH @ some of your readers. While you're explaining comments to people, you might wanna explain to Aztec the difference btwn a fact and an opinion. Or maybe I can save you the trouble...

Opinion: Kelis got too much $
Fact: Kelis got what the judge gave her based on Nas' salary/future earning potential.

If his son was living with him full-time, would he cut him off at a %age?
paulette-BAJAN-gal

For folk that don't have any kids it's hard to understand the cost of raising a child.....and if that child has celebrity parents the price tag is magnified significantly.She will need security and have to hire the best nannies and send the kid to the private schools...the price tag is not cheap.

And as someone who gets child support myself....they came up with that price tag based on his documented income....so figure like 17% of his income is what they came up with.So bro is hella loaded....no matter what speculations are made about his rapper status.Cause 17% of my child's father's income is nowhere near that amount.The bulk of my single mom friends get no more than $500 a month....and even then...it ain't enough.

The courts sides with the custodial parent...so if a man wants his kids...she has to pay child support.bet how many men are jumping on that opportunity??...not many.

Redman and Meth sound really stupid with their commentary.How many kids are they paying child support for??How many days a week do they see them??...it's cheaper to be a real father to your God damn kids.Dudes that just pay child support and think they are doing someone a favor is jaded.So you bought the pants but can't recognise the kid on the street???...awesome.
DIVISION

I never understood why Nas chose Kelis....

He could have his pick of women in the industry but he settle on her....

I know for a fact that Pac is looking down with a look of utter disdain for Nas's choice in women.

Ultimately, it reflects badly upon Nasir.

Pac was dealing with Jada, Left Eye and Kidada Jones......

Nasir was left to play with Kelis and co......

I rest my case.
KENT

Child support is unfair to men period! It does not take 20-40k per month to raise a kid. What would be far for a wealthy man $1500 a month (and that all) and for "spousal support" PLEASE!!!!! they are not married anymore her life is going to change, but so is his, so that bullshit about keeping her in a life style that she has "grown accustomed" to is total BS! what about what he was "accustomed" to??

Any man who is wealthy and is even considering marriage is a fool. If I were wealthy I would avoid marriage like the plague! (I would have children, but no marriage, (screw that!!) I am not going to put myself in a position to be pimed by my ex or the court system.
Men you need to wake up!
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