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Stop Tweeting Your Love (Electronic Displays of Affection)

Posted by NWSO • August 11, 2009 • Printer-friendly

Last week I told y’all how I felt about PDA. It’s cool in moderation; it’s just when people take the smoochin’ and gropin’ overboard that I have a problem. No hate in my blood, I’d just appreciate a little decorum and self-control when in the presence of those that don’t want to see all that. I thought I had covered all the bases of this topic but then I discovered a whole other level of public displays of affection.

I was reading through RapRadar the other day when I noticed my homie YN put up a post called “Swizz Loves Alicia, She Loves His Art.” I haven’t really kept tabs of the whole Swizz Beatz/Alicia Keys love affair (really don’t care) so I figured let me see what’s going on with this odd couple.

I was greeted by screen grabs of the following Twitter exchange:

SuperwomanAK: “One of my favorite things about @therealswizzz is his paintings! A true artist knows no boundaries…”

THEREALSWIZZZ: “@SuperwomanAK Wowwwwww mama thanks there are a lot of things I love about you but there are too many to name LOL!!!!!!!!”

What you have just witnessed is a clear case of EDA. It’s a term coined by my fellow blogger, GangStarrGirl, used to describe “electronic displays of affection.”

As much as I write honestly and openly on this blog, I’m still a pretty private person. Remember, I always keep my socks on so—believe it or not—there are some things I keep to myself. With that said, the idea of EDA is not my cup of tea.

Like I said earlier, I really haven’t been following the Swizz/Alicia affair—but is his divorce even finalized yet? If not, I think it’s a bit coldblooded to be publicly professing your love for another woman online. But maybe that’s me.

Again, I’m not knocking anyone for expressing their feelings for someone (we actually need more of that in our community) but couldn’t a text or actual phone call have conveyed the same message without the audience. I don’t know, it just seems like a private conversation that was put on blast for all their followers and the world to see. I wonder if they plan on tweeting their arguments too. Now that’d be interesting.

I imagine it’d go something like this:

SuperwomanAK: “@therealswizzz I hate you so much right now.”

THEREALSWIZZZ: “@SuperwomanAK What did I do now?”

SuperwomanAK: “@therealswizzz I can’t believe you left your dirty ass drawers on the floor.”

THEREALSWIZZZ: “@SuperwomanAK I’ll pick em up later, I had to get to the studio. Quit naggin’ me.”

SuperwomanAK: “@therealswizzz OH, I’ll show you a nag. Wait till your ass gets home.”

THEREALSWIZZZ: “@SuperwomanAK AAAARRGGH!!!”

Of course the above exchange was completely fictional but who’s to say it won’t happen or hasn’t happened already. Twitter isn’t the only place I’ve seen examples of EDA. FaceBook and MySpace are filled with “I love you,” “I had fun last night” or “Great seeing you” comments posted on people’s pages for all lurking eyes to see.

At times, I look at EDA the same way I do at hickies; it’s one person’s way of marking their territory. It’s a big bacdafucup message for any girl or guy scheming on your mate. It’s how some people stake claim to what they believe is theirs. As much as it’s a genuine display of affection for some, it can just as easily be a sign of insecurity for another.

Is EDA worse than PDA? It’s debatable. Having a couple make out in front of you may be physically repulsive to some, while others can say the same about gushing tweet or FaceBook comments. PDA may make me want to yell out, “Get a room!” Well, EDA makes me want to holla, “Get a chat room!” Or maybe that’s just me.

What do you think of Swizz and Alicia’s Twitter exchange? Should they have kept the love talk offline? Does it make a difference that Swizz is going through a messy divorce? Is something like that disrespectful to an ex? Have you ever witnessed EDA firsthand? Does it bother you to see two people gush over each other online or you don’t care either way? Have you ever had someone post something private or inappropriate on your MySpace or FaceBook page? Have you ever caught someone cheating because of EDA? Is EDA worse than PDA?

Speak your piece…

Tagged as: affection, Alicia Keys, cheating, EDA, FaceBook, Mashonda, MySpace, PDA, Swizz Beatz, twitter

http://girlshesgottahaveit.blogspot.com/ Jennifer

Up until that Twitter exchange, these two have been pretty mum about their relations(hip), so I kinda think that this could be some kind of stunt to keep their buzz up. Clearly they know that we know their situation, so why else would two seemingly private people put their business out there like that? Tacky and disrespectful indeed if the divorce isn't even final yet.

EDA is fine with me, but in moderation. Cutesy pics of you and your boo is nice (I love love), but don't dedicate multiple photo albums and Twitter/Facebook statuses to him/her. You're liable to get your behind deleted for that one.
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biff

its all good she has been a bitch sence day one they gave her the crown...i love maried men they just do it better tell it like you should alica married men are perfect lovers best ones are the onens that are haveing a baby
http://www.singleblackmale.org/ Single Black Male

I feel you on this one. I'm not a fan of PDA at the mall ... so for what reason would I want some public record of my affection.

I will say though ... I have been caught using my blog to throw some EDA ... but ... that was awhile ago ... she was crazy ... I was losing it.
http://www.randomrhymereason.blogspot.com Jazzy

I don't mind PDA as long as couples aren't TOO carried away with it. EDA is completely unnecessary...it's so obvious it's mostly for the benefit of the public audience, whereas in-person PDA could be bc the 2 people are so wrapped up in each other they lose track of an audience.

The AK/Swizz affair disgusts me. He's still married and it's huge disrespect to his not-even-ex-wife-yet. And AK has the nerve to call herself a "Superwoman"? Okaaaaay.

Remember that song "Girlfriend" on her debut album..."I think I'm jealous of your girlfriend..although she's just a girl who is your friend..bc she shares a special part of you...I see some possibilities..." Never trust a woman who doesn't trust other women.
Elle

Amen@ Never trust a woman who doesn't trust other women.

As for the topic, I couldn't care less. If you don't want to see EDA, don't look. It's that frigging simple.

I don't use twitter because I don't see the point in always informing the rest of the world about what I am currently doing or thinking. Who the hell cares if I am having a Caramel Frapp and some Pizza? Why does the world need to know that I am currently at work hiding from my boss in the restroom? Makes no sense whatsoever.

Yet and still, if people want to display their love, interest, flirty behaviour so be it. It's not different from the other BS in my opinion.

Don't follow it and you won't be annoyed.
Melody

I soooo agree with Elle, I mean NWSO, is it really that serious? Swizz didnt really say that much to her in his tweet. "theres too many things to name" umm ok.. its not like he said "I love it when u ..." or I cant wait to see you so we can..." Is his divorce finalized yet... who cares? They been "rumored" as being a couple for over a damn yr now...bizness all over the net!!
As far as EDA I'll take that over PDA any time...cuz u dont have to read it, if u dont want.. click the X at the top right, and buh-bye!
Righteous Mama

Insecure men and women who mark their territory are the worst. But I actually like EDA. I think people who are open and expressive about their love for their friends and partners is a beautiful thing. Why y'all so damn grumpy??! lol.
http://twitter.com/duepayer Shawn Lee

I have to agree with Righteous Mama, I can staaaaaand when a female "marks her territory" when we don't even have anything goin on. Posting on my Facebook page fiddy-leben times to keep these imaginary "other women" at bay reeks of insecurity and corniness. I don't think there's anything worse than a corny and desperate woman...

But the occasional EDA moment isn't such a bad thing. Just like anything else, its just an issue when done excessively.
Dc Man with a Plan

Tweets and moment to moment updates on FB or any other social networking element is a bit much for me--but SOME ppl get into that, so to each his own. I'm just keeping my eye on Verizon and AT&T's stock so I can benefit from all this tweetin goin on out here...lol.....As far as fiine azz Alicia and dude..dang, slim, why she gotta be party to THAT! This is like some Bobby Brown/Whitney B/S...Dude should have enuff self control and respect for his soon to be "EX" to keep his dating life on the low-low until the ink is dry on the divorce papers. His comments were not overly provocative, but they leave enuff of an impression that ANY woman would be disturbed if her man was exchanging messages like that with another woman, so yeah, it's out the box. I don't fully agree with the view Elle expressed aboutr how easy it is to NOT engage or hear about the lives of the rich and famous........we can't help but get glimpses of other folks lives even when we're not actively trying to be nosey--then we have a chance to have discourse about what is right and what is wrong. I think it's a good thing to use others ppl's B/S to establish the line of what each of us perceives as right and wrong. I don't want to make every mistake on my own…..lol..some shyt I'm gonna learn from the travails of others...like former Detroit mayor Kwame’s pitfall reminds me to NEVER text anything I don't potentially want the world to see because once it's out there--it can be retrieved by unintended recipients --for a price.
Mz. Ashley

EDA is not so bad...like they said before, you dont have to read it if you dont want too.
http://nwso.net NWSO

@Melody

In regards to Swizz & Alicia, the EDA expression came with the "I Love you" part. THEN, the bigger issue is he's still married and publicly professing love for the woman he cheated on his wife with and now new sites are picking up on it. A bit disrespectful to Mashonda.

Yes, not the most gushy example, but a springboard for me to raise this discussion nonetheless. Ideally it's teh folks going back and forth with "I love you more" "No I love you more x a million" that can go get a chatroom and stay out the public feed. LOL

And yes, there are pros and cons to both EDA and PDA just gauging the public's thoughts.

Love ya still (LOL)

***Wait, I take that back***
dominque h.

Lol. I love Starr's new "EDA" come-up. Nevertheless, it is what is. Who cares about Swizz and AK and their love affair? Lol. Generally speaking, EDA is kind of wack when you know you're fronting for the "Internets" and we know who you are (outside of your status update). In some instances its even used as tools of revenge or spite. Either way, "Freedom of Tweet" is something that I totally believe in.
Kwana AKA OrangeStar AKA Phoenix7

I think its wack just like the both of them, sorry but a text would have sufficed WTH are they doing that on Twitter???
I don't do EDA's at all sh*ts corny!
could just be generational tho thing but neither of them are exactly teens, younger adults LOL
YoungJay

Whatever floats your boat I say....I can't waste my time worrying about what other people are tweeting each other lol
Kwana AKA OrangeStar AKA Phoenix7

stating your opinion on a posed question isn;t exactly worrying about something IMO LMAO
da ThRONe

Who really cares? I really dislike the whole groupy thing anyways. Whos more important than me? I would never know if two people(famous or not) was doing this because I pay them no mind. This unlike PDA is so easy to ignore.
litrisha

Hey Ans I gree with you 100%!

Leave all that PDA and EDA at home or just privately text it, why would you want everyone in your business? Like do you not have enough time on your hands....LOL Another thing that bothers me and I don't think that I've ever participated in any of it....ok like on Facebook everyone's posting about what they are doing AT THAT VERY MOMENT....WHO CARES??? Who cares that you are at Wal-Mart shopping for the kids???? Maybe I'm just mean but I don't have time to be posting EVERY LITTLE THING that's going on in my life and worst off EDA....A WASTE OF TIME!!!! But then again that's just mean old me I guess...
biff

What I dont understand why dont the real media talk about this its just so nasty how alicia did this
YoungJay

When I said "worrying"...it was in reference to EDA's in general...you dont "Have" to pay attention to it, so I dont think it should bother you...Now PDA on the other hand if your in a closed environment (e.g.- train) is a whole different circumstance
http://? Charity

I don't really pay attention to any of that stuff, to each his own.

Some people (Hollywood) or not, thrive on drawing attention to themselves. I personally, am a very private person, so I'm not putting my action out there for the world to see.

If you like it.....I love it! Peace!
Keisha

What do you think of Swizz and Alicia’s Twitter exchange?
-I think it's cute

Should they have kept the love talk offline?
-Yes, considering that a) he's not officially single b)she's a role model for many young women. But then again.. isn't half the magazines in the world following Ocho-baby daddy Jon (of Jon and Kate?)

Does it make a difference that Swizz is going through a messy divorce? Is something like that disrespectful to an ex?
-Yes it is disrespectful

Have you ever witnessed EDA firsthand?
-I'm in a long distance relationship, so I am guilty of EDA since a) i'm not a fan of PDA myself b) my opportunities to express myself my afffections are limited

Does it bother you to see two people gush over each other online or you don’t care either way?
-Bother me? No. Because the world could use a little love. Who are they hurting??

Have you ever had someone post something private or inappropriate on your MySpace or FaceBook page?
-Yes. But that more is about the person not having their own boundries than anything else.

Have you ever caught someone cheating because of EDA?
-Nope.

Is EDA worse than PDA?
-No. But we also have to recognize there are several levels of P/EDA. Holding hands is a sign of affection. If words on a screen is worse than people making out.. then there are much bigger issues at hand.
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biff

I dont get how it does not matter what they do in public dont you have kids or nephews and nieces ,they listen and watch and use internet and read like evey one ,we all grown with our music the two are every place
P.Lynn

Ok I didn't wanna say it but the public asked for it.

Leave my AK and Swizzy alone!

Twitter is sooo useless and it is basically and update of my life site, so ya'll wanted dirt now ya'll got it. What about when all the other celebs type in I just brushed my teeth or going to work out. It is basically a way to keep groupies updated on exactly what others are doing. The legal way to stalk somebody.
Boy I got angry for a sec. I say let the stars try to act normal if they want. If Alica and Swizz were in public discussing drawers on the floor TMZ would have a snap fest and video record them. Let them be public how they want to, at least we don't have to look at them. NWSO didn't u do a public affection blog...I wrote on that too.
http://nwso.net NWSO

@ P. Lynn

Yeah, it was mentioned and linked in the first sentence of this post.

What, you skimming through my hard work?

SMH
http://www.gangstarrgirl.com Gangstarr Girl

PDA sucks. EDA blows. Boo.

HATE! HATE! HATE! HATE! HATE!

Thanks for creating a post revolving around my new term. I feel smart and stuff. =0)
MsBRG

What is an exhibitionist without a voyeur?

Someone minding their own business...

:-p
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http://myspace.com/kobe81fan Shay from L.A. (Los Angeles)

"PDA sucks. EDA blows. Boo.

HATE! HATE! HATE! HATE! HATE!"

Touche...
wendy

I rember a young alicia keys that I thought would be an out spoken women strong minded a women who would shape other young girl..
im so disapointed .
DIVISION

Twitter itself is really just a parody of human interaction.

Most intelligent people don't use twitter because they aren't concerned with the mundane actions of others and really aren't terribly interested in posting their own for the groupies....

Those people who "need" to know what you're doing have your number. They'll call.

In terms of Alicia Keys...........eh.....she's overrated.

Goapele is so much better as an artist, more attractive as well.

Closer......
Righteous Mama

Okay, at first I thought some of y'all was just hatin'. But there is a chic on FB right now who is irkin me so bad I had to come back and share a comment. lol

I can see how some people go over the top. ALL NIGHT LONG this chic has been posting comments like oh how I wish you were here with me right now, oh how I love the sound of you sleeping on the phone. Like for real? *me vomiting*

Ok, I get it. lol. Some people go overboard. Don't need or want to read about all that. I appreciate people in love and all but that's just nauseating.
AJ ROK

I think the whole EDA thing is cool with moderation, I have told my wife I love her in her status on facebook once or twice... I agree its better than PDA...
but I won't comment much on the Swizz/ AK situation cause I don't know all the facts, but will say if it's true a word of advice to Sistah AK...
If you man cheats on his wife to be with you, you don't think said man will cheat on you with anotha... I mean I'm not judging nobody I'm just saying!
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Chanel

YEAH DATZ RITE CUZ IF ALICIA KEYS AND SWIZZ BEATZ WANNA BE 2GETHER DEN LET THEM BE AND ANYWAY DAY GON HAV A BABY SO LEAVE THEM ALONE AND LET THEM HAVE THERE PEACE DANG YALL DON'T WANT NOBODY 2 BE IN YO BUZZNEZZ BUT SHOUT OUT 2 ALICIA KEYS & SWIZZ BEATZ CONGATZ ON YALL BABY LOVE yall yall is da cutest couple in da world.