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What Exactly is Good Hair? (I Miss My S Curl)

Posted by NWSO • August 17, 2009 • Printer-friendly

In the process of writing last Friday’s post, “I Don’t Date Girls in Gangs,” I scoured the Net for clips from Spike Lee’s School Daze as reference points. Despite what the ensuing digital riot made me reevaluate, looking back at the 1988 film reminded me of the scene where the “Jigaboos” and the “Wannabes broke” into song and dance over the issue of “Good and Bad Hair.”

Discussions about hair in the African-American community have been going on for God knows how long and shows no signs of going away any time soon. In fact, just last week fellow scribe Aliya S. King revealed her on-going battles with her follicles on her blog (CLICK HERE) and JB over at ifuxwitit.com put me on to Chris Rock’s upcoming documentary, Good Hair (CLICK HERE).

For the most part, when we talk about Black hair the conversation revolves around females and their use of relaxers, perms, and weaves and the battle over “Blackness.” While women are the ones who consume a bulk of hair care products and are known more for their tresses, Black men have their own issues with hair as well.

As far as I can remember I’ve always had a lot of hair on my head. It wasn’t until two years ago that I cut my waist-length locks in favor of a Caesar and now a baldie. Prior to that, some 16 years ago (damn!), I had braids. Before that, I had a slope, and before that I had a high top fade. Of course that spawned from my TWA (teeny weeny Afro), but the precursor to all of the above was my S-Curl. (Cue the Soul Glo theme music).

Man, I loved my S-Curl. It wasn’t as “greasy” as a Jheri Curl and helped bring out my “natural curls.” I couldn’t stand Luster’s Pink Oil Moisturizer, but you couldn’t tell me nothing about my Wave Gel Activator. I’d squeeze some of that magical blue concoction in the palm of my hand with a little bit of water and it was on.

I’m not sure why my mother decided to give me an S-Curl as a kid, but it definitely helped ease the pain when she was combing my hair. Anyone that’s had one of those black picks with the big fist on the end knows how much those metal teeth hurt. I swear my mom’s practically lifted me off the ground with that pick every time she ran it through my “nappy” little head.

Despite a few laughs when I got one, the S-Curl provided me and my tender head with a more “manageable” mane. Even when my S-Curl days were long over, I’d still rub in a little bit of that styling pomade every once in a while for effect. It was all in a quest to have that “good” hair.

The funny thing is, over the years, I’ve heard that I actually have “good” hair. Well, if you look close enough.

With most of my formative years spent getting homemade haircuts from my mom, who specialized in TWAs, I never got the full barbershop experience as a kid. There wasn’t that one guy that always cut my hair. I’d just go to the shop when I needed a shapeup and would sit in whoever’s chair was available first.

Anyway, this one day in particular the barber whose chair I drew wound up cutting my hair super low after I told him I wanted a fade with a “little off the top.” The cut wasn’t that bad, just not what I was used to because like I said, I’ve always had a lot of hair on my head.

The next day at school this girl who sat across from me in homeroom but never really spoke to me before said, “Nice haircut.”

“Thanks,” I smiled.

“I never noticed you had good hair,” she continued.

The sound of her voice expressed shock, like how could the quiet kid with the bush on his head actually have “good” hair buried underneath?

I’d hear that tone again as I eventually grew locks. The assumption by many is often that it takes “nappy” hair to grow dreads, but whenever a woman would twist my locks for me (those were the days) or happen to be standing while I was seated, she’d take note: “Oh, you actually have ‘good’ hair.”

I’d smile and be cordial because “good” is always, well, good, but I always had to ask myself: What exactly is “good” hair?

That’s the question Rock poses in the trailer for his documentary. The first person he asks is a African-American woman—seated under the dryer in a hair salon with several multi-colored rollers in her hair—who responds: “Something that looks relaxed and nice.”

In essence, she’s saying that our own natural hair is not “nice.” Sadly, that’s something that’s drilled into our heads from an early age. Wavy, curly, and straight is pretty, but “kinky” or “nappy” is somehow ugly. If you really want to take it there, you can translate that to mean anything emulating White standards of beauty is alright, while plain ol’ Black is just wack.

At the end of the Good Hair trailer Rock tries to sell Black hair at an L.A. beauty supply store and the shopkeeper rejects his offer. “We don’t want to look like, you know, Africa like this,” says the Asian man behind the counter, extending his hands to signify an Afro. “You make sure the hair is straight—look more natural.”

Last time I checked, “natural” meant having undergone little or no processing and containing no chemical additives. So if African-Americans are born with “nappy” hair then so be it, because that’s natural for us.

American society, however, has long told us different. That’s why I love brothers and sisters with the confidence to buck the system and rock their hair natural. There’s just a certain level of comfort with oneself that they seem to exude. A pride that more of us need to have of our own culture, features and history.

Now, that’s no knock to anyone that’s dyed, fried or laid to the side, because hair, whether natural or processed, doesn’t determine a person’s character. I’ve known plenty of weaved women that were more for the cause than the sister with a “trendy” Afro or locks. Shoot, Malcolm “Red” Little was street hustler that proudly rocked a permed hairdo before becoming Malcolm X. At the end of the day, we should spend less time focused on who has “good” hair and more on determining who’s actually a good person.

Andre 3000 said it best on “Aquemini” when he spit, “Now question is every ni**a with dreads for the cause?/Is every ni**a with golds for the fall?/Naw, so don't get caught in appearance.”

Did anyone else have an S-Curl or Jheri Curl growing up? When did you first learn about the idea that there’s “good” hair? How do/did you define “good” hair? Were you ever teased for your hair as a kid? Any ladies willing to admit they wanted to get with a guy because he had “pretty” hair? How old were you when you got your first perm? Do you have any hair horror stories? What do you think about guys who obsess over their hair and wear durags to get their baby waves? Fellas, was I the only one that got homemade haircuts as a kid? Do you have a preference in the women you date and whether or not they have a perm or natural hair? Is the male hair experience different than the female experience?

Speak your piece…

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Tagged as: black fist, flo bee, hair pick, Jheri Curl, S-Curl, Soul Glo

M.L.

@NWSO I first learned the idea of "good hair" a while back. Maybe 8 year's ago. When i was a young dude. I had the Curly Hair. I rocked it for a long time. Then i went to the Cornrows. But for some reason I didn't have kinky enough hair. I had "good" hair. Which made my Rows good for a little while. After about 3 days i always had to take them out. Then i went to the Scary Movie 2 hair. Lolz! The 1 Marlon Wayans was rocking. After that i went with the Spikey Hair. Man that was a bad move. But People where digging it. And i got teased daily about my hair. Then 1 day i went Bald Every thing Changed More Stares. Do i have a preference when it comes' to Hair on My Female? Hell yeah. If im hitting it, And Tracks are in My hand that's not a good look. I wouldn't mind if it was Short, Meduim, Shoulder Length. Im Just not down with the Wigs & "Extra Hair". No Disrespect to the Ladies on this Blog. If you can rock it go ahead. More Power to you. Good Post NWSO.
http://www.gangstarrgirl.com Gangstarr Girl

Did you say a "slope?" Damn son, you old! lol
Spinster

Got the first perm at age 9 or 10. Stopped putting chemicals in it 14 years later and will never do it again.

Horror stories? Itching, burning, scabs, etc. And ladies, don't front and say that you didn't let the perm stay in longer so that it could be "just a little more straight".

Good hair is healthy hair. For me, that's hair with no chemicals. But to each their own, can't sit here and bash others because of their (hair) choices. It's their head of hair. *shrugs*
http://www.mstrecie.com MsTrecie

I got my first perm at 12...behind my parents back. I let my cousin put in a Just For Me perm and surprised my parents when they came to pick me up. My mom was pissed. I permed religiously up until Feb. of this year. I began my transition and did the big chop Aug. 4th.

I have always received so many remarks about how I have a nice grade of hair and a nice texture to it. The standards of beauty that are placed in the media leads to these broad generalizations about 'good hair'. Idealistically, we would not be judged solely based on what we are told is beautiful, but we are....as sad as that is. We have placed images of 'beauty' out in the world and wonder why women starve themselves or weave it up all the time.

When I debuted my short do, the initial response was 'its cute but why you cut it' or 'you better be glad your hair is curly because it would look a mess.' I think a kinky fro is nice looking. Why is natural so wrong?

As Spinster said...good hair is healthy hair. I am happy natural and do not foresee another application of creamy crack ,aka a perm, in my future!
CB

I wanted a perm so badly because I had super thick hair growing up... I remember Grandma pressing it every 3-4 weeks cause mom was not even trying to deal with it... when grandma was getting too old to press it I finally got a perm at 14.

Like Spinster I had the itching, burning and scabs but loved how straight my hair was because I didn't have to worry about it getting kinky if I went out to play or sweat. I only had to worry about getting my hair wet in the rain, but then I could still just blow dry it and go and not have to deal with that hot comb!

Over the years I went shorter and shorter with my hair (from hair down the middle of my back, to a Halle Berry haircut, to Toni Braxton's first cut, then to a caesar). I went natural in 1999 and have been going back & forth from growing it out to recently chopping it off again to a caesar.

I am of Trinidad descent and I always thought that my paternal grandmother's hair was "good" hair. She has hair like Chilli from the group TLC... I loved how it would just curl up when wet, and was naturally wavy when dry. It was soft and shiny and that was how I defined good hair growing up... but now I realize good hair is hair that is healthy so whether it's kinky, straight or curly as long as your hair is healthy you have all the good hair that you need.
Dc Man with a Plan

I would hope today's generation is better educated in self awareness to a point where they understand the tendency to gage so many things based on a european perspective that is not historically been inclusive of our culture. But old views die hard and no woman can tell me the whole "perm/relaxer" thing isn't about trying to make hair do what it doesn't naturally tend to do. And I will admit, WE men don't help bcuz we like the straight hair, permed look too, BUT, we also have evolved to liking and respecting a natural look bcuz sista's have learned to wear it well and proudly. When you think about chemical relaxers and view the process....it stinks and is ugly, but the end product--is cute. I would think it not worthwhile. Natural hair can take more time and need more attention, but I have come to prefer it over weaves. My order of preference is: natural style, processed hair then weave/wigs. I think weaves have made life so much easier for sista's who can blame them for it, but damn, can't we cash in on some of the billions Sue Lee and Praida Zong are making? The weave industry is almost totally dependant on Black women and now we can't even get in on producing and selling the products, we have again become just end users bcuz the Asian community has the "hair" industry on lock-down, which to ME is more reason sistas ought to go natural. The truth be told, in the Black community, the term "good hair" has typically meant you have some kinda "mix" going on...got a lil extra White flavoring, a lil Mexican, Native American, somethin........... WE'VE come a long way BABY!
Dc Man with a Plan

I plead ignorance regarding other cultures. I know there is some degree of wigs and hair pieces worn by White women, but I don't know if it compares to the usage among Black women, nor how other groups such as women from India, South America and other places, feel about hair modification systems. I can say it is my belief that women ALL over the world want to have what they characterize as beautiful, manageable hair because it appears to me based on my travels, that women put a lot of value on their appearance and hair is a BIG part of how they see themselves.
Potato w Jive

good hair or bad hair, but this situation right here is impressive...
http://i51.photobucket.com/albums/f366/len_spen/afrohat.jpg
The Intellect

To me "good" hair is healthy hair. I have had a relaxer since the 8th grade and not once can I complain of damage being done to my hair. My hair is naturally thick even with a perm, but the perm just helps me to manage my hair better.

I am really sick and tired of people who made the transition talking about women who have not as being lost or afraid of their heritage. Getting a relaxer was a choice I made and I knew that when I made this choice I would have to practice something most black women don't: Hair Care Maintenance! No, I don't let just anybody put chemicals in my hair, I go to people who have a proven and shown track record for producing hair that looks healthy and understands the different ways to treat Black hair. This superior vibe I get from women who go natural rubs me the wrong way because I feel that they don't see the versatility of Black hair. What other ethnicity has so many options for what they can do to their hair, not many. But instead of imbracing and loving this versatility we use it as a weapon to break each other down. I totally respect my friends who have gone natural, wear a weave, or get a relaxer but I can't respect anyone who let's their hair define them to a point that they feel the need to judge others based on hair.
BADbrownbunny

If the perm looks staright it is cause I have pressed it after a kiddie perm. Never leave that stuff in for more that 5 mins.

I do love my black hair but when I want a different look I can get it. I wouldn't trade this thick mob of tight curls for anyone.

Oh yeah, I am currently sporting a FroHawk ;.)
http://thecocoaluvchronicles.blogspot.com/2008/09/hair.html Miss Cocoa Luv

When did you first learn about the idea that there’s “good” hair?
The craziest thing about this notion is that I've heard it too many times before. When I hear it I give a blank stare and/or say "Umm thanks" or "What's that?" I mean really isn't it 2009? Just recently I had my hair in a ponytail and this crackhead came up to me and said "Oh you have good hair..." "Yea you have good hair like me.." All that I could do is laugh and smh. She doesn't know any better. When I did hair shows this hair stylist said to me "Ooohh girl you got some gooh haih, come on and shake it like a white girl" smh that was when I had a relaxer. It's all amusing to me really. I'm just happy that I grew up in NYC rather than down south because it would not have been as pleasant. smh at my people.

How do/did you define “good” hair?
If you have hair GOOD. If you don't GOOD.

Were you ever teased for your hair as a kid? Thank goodness I wasn't. If anything many of the girls were JEALOUS. I'm just sayin.

Any ladies willing to admit they wanted to get with a guy because he had “pretty” hair?
I personally don't like guys to have hair so it never really mattered to me. A low cut caesar works for me. Waves don't do it either, they spend more time in the mirror than i do. I'm good on that. I don't know how to braid and locks never really did anything for me.
I crack up when I see these couples that you know are obviously with each other for the hopes that the kids have curly and/or straight hair and the kids come out with the opposite. Goes to show that you can't date someone because of their hair type/skin color.

How old were you when you got your first perm?
I was 10. I didn't really need one, but I would beg my mother for one, SMH at that thought. I had A LOT of hair and was tender headed to boot. My mom would threaten to cut it off with the scissors after my constant tears. Now I am 2 years natural and still tender headed SMH but I won't even think about getting that creamy crack... the temptation to pick up the emergency kit have gone away. lol

Do you have any hair horror stories?
One time I took my extensions out and instead of combing it out before washing, I went straight to the sink to wash...BIG MISTAKE. My hair was matted and it took me FOREVER to get the tangles out. I nearly cried because it was just a big mess. I eventually got the scissors to get it taken care of. Lesson learned make sure you get the braid gunk out before you wash.

Peep my piece on this here: thecocoaluvchronicles dot blogspot dot com/2008/09/hair dot html
xhiba AKA englishrose

Growing up, my mum was not into me perming my hair. The good hair phenomenon hit me when i was about 11 but didn’t bug me too much as a lot of the girls in my school carried their hair natural.
At 12 i had my 1st perm. I realised perming wasn’t for me cos of the high maintance it required (salon visit every week for a wash and set etc).5 years later, i went natural. Grew locks but realised i didn't like them either and chopped them off after 2years. I have had my natural nappy kinky hair for the past 8years. I alternate between letting it grow slightly but i predominately rock a brush cut. It suits me cos i have a cute shaped head and it makes me look fresher and younger than longer hair. I could never go back to perming etc cos it's time consuming and most of all you spend lots of money on it knowingly and at times unknowingly. When i do have children...especially girl children, i won't go crazy about all the good hair bad hair fodder that is fed to them by the world. they will be natural until they can afford to have their hair done themselves.
My brother is at the stage where he is into braiding his hair and at times he has it out. i chuckle when i see how much effort he is putting into it and i rejoice that i don't have to go through any of that anymore.
As for guys who spend their time obsessing over their hair, am so not in to.I see them being more into themselves than me. Would rather have a guy witha brush cut or a balddie
http://nwso.net NWSO

@Potato w Jive

WOWWWWWW!!!!

***speechless***
Lonias

It really is a shame that I was in my 30s before I gained an appreciation for my natural texture. I was rushing one evening to go somewhere and I was in "hair crisis" mode--in between relaxers...on the edge of looking a hot mess (ladies, ya'll feel me!). I ended up washing it and blowing it out! And lo and behold: it was NOT the nightmarish mess I had been convinced all my life by family and hairdressers it would be in its natural state.

This summer is the second time I have worn my hair this way. I will relax it again this fall, but I know I'll come back to this. I REALLY LOVE IT!!! Who knew!?!?!
TaiTai

Ah NWSO...
The memories you just brought back!
I can recall, as a YGB (young ghetto baby), sitting on a milk crate (the plastic one IKEA modeled their shelving after), as my momma's best friend (momma was too busy grindin to worry bout doing some hair) combed through, sectioned and braided my hair. She useta do me up in those tiny lil braids with the 6 beads and the tinfoil on the end...you know the ones...if you turned yo head too quick, you risked taking an eye out? Yeah. As a tender-yet-"nappy" headed youth, THIS was torture!

Frome there I progressed to the press-n-curl (and I do believe the tops of my ears have permanent nerve damge from being burnt), the Jherri Curl (I rocked that for like, 6 years--don't judge me!), and the "Janet Jackson in Poetic Justice" box braids. When I finally put some of the "creamy crack" (around 13) on my head, My mid-back length hair broke off. SMDH!

I continued with the CC through HS, desperate to have "good hair". My fam always said as long as I had a relaxer, my hair was "pretty" and "manageable". One aunt useta say it looked like a wig. (hater) The summer before my freshman year at the Best HBCU in the Country (FAMU!) I cut off all my hair and did and "texturizer" (basically the S-Curl that dudes useta rock). I liked it, but I was getting some inappropriate side eyes from sistas that batted from the other side of the plate (what up wit dat!?) so I got back on the crack (of the creamy variety).

FINALLY, around 2005, I started the loc'ing process and I'm almost back to my pre-creamy crack length! All that hair anthology to say, it wasn't until I (A) stopped listening to what society was saying about how black hair should look and (B) started to appreciate my hair in its natural state, that I truly found peace with my mane. Ironically, I get more love for my locs than I ever got for my relaxed do...NATURAL HAIR IS BEAUTIFUL (AND GOOD HAIR)!!!
Anonymous One

I agree with The Intellect that we need to embrace the versatility that we have as a race, not only with our hair but with everything else (like skin color) as well. Although, we are not the only race who has the issue of "good hair". Jewish women, Italians, Latinos, Asians, etc all have they're ideas of what's considered good and bad hair.

As far as I'm concerned, as long as you have hair on your head and it's healthy, you have "good hair". Natural, relaxed, weave/wigs...who cares as long as you take care of it. My hair was natural up until I was 14, when I got my first relaxer. No horror stories, my hair was thick, soft, curly and long then and the only difference now is its straight. I can still rock the natural look if I wash it and leave it cus it will curl up, or if I do a braid set. I love the fact that I could go either way with my looks.

Just a side note for the fellas, don't be fooled into thinking a woman with natural hair doesn't have a weave or wig. It may not be in every store, but you can get a "kinky" wig or weave just like you can get it straight. Also, the weave and wigs are no longer surviving soley on black woman, every race of women rich and poor, hollywood and the hood are using them.
http://myspace.com/nexus_da_underdawg da ThRONe

That part was my least favorite part of "School Daze"!

This is what happens when one race imposes its culture on another race. Which causes a whole race of people to have an idea of beauty that they cant live up to.
LaVonda

I chopped off my perm 5 years ago and haven't looked back. Literally. I love my natural hair and don't miss the maintenance of a perm.

I don't look down on other women who decide to perm their hair--I mean I wore a perm back in the day! But the "good" or "bad" hair debate is ridiculous to me. It's just hair. Keep it neat, natural or not. It doesn't define me, and I'm not "blacker" or more "in touch" than my weaved or permed sisters. Give it a rest and rock your look!
Belle

i got a perm at 13 (begged for it, my mom said not till i was 14, then gave in... long story, which I might tell tomorrow), rocked one religiously until the day before I turned 18 (permed my edges every 2 weeks the whole time). two years ago, i missed playing with a curling iron so I shaved off my shoulder length fluff, and grew out my hair with a perm so I could rock a mohawk. Got sick of that, shaved it off and grew it out curly and blonde. got sick of that, shaved it off and carved stars in it. then i grew that out, permed it and went a faux-hawk with hearts in the side.

for some women, they have a "unique" outlook that says natural texture = bad. others respect their texture but want a different look. Sometimes, it's about (unknown) self-hate, other times, something else. There's not only one way to love your hair. You can love it straight AND happily nappy too. Loving one doesn't mean hating the other.

When I'm over this faux-hawk thing, i'll probably shave it off again until I decide what's next.

the idea of good vs bad hair isn't just a black thing. white people do it too. long, straight, blond is the American beauty standard. if you're a curly-headed brunette white woman you have issues with your hair too.
Organized Chaos

Great post, NWSO......fantastic recovery from the last one lol, but, I digress.....

Peace and love to all my brothers and sisters who have decided to go on that natural journey. I am not ashamed to admit that I was addicted to crack cream aka perm aka relaxer for years. My mother decided to have my first one applied when I was 3 or 4 years old because my hair is EXTREMELY thick and was really hard to manage when I was a kid. I've always been told that I have a 'nice grade of hair'. It never made a difference to me and I never let it define who I was.

I've done just about everything to my hair except for rock it really short. I was that sistah with the fresh just past the shoulder roller wrap that blew in the wind and reminded you of black silk (yeah I said it). I wanted a change, so I decided to take that journey. I was so tired of wasting my Thursday evenings or Saturday mornings at the over booked beauty salon then having to worrying about if my curls would keep, what was going to happen if I got caught in the rain, or if i was (clearing throat) in the middle of some extra-curricular activities was dude gonna sweat my new do out.

November 1, 2007 the last relaxer was applied and so began my journey. October 2008 was the big chop and I haven't looked back since. I have gotten mixed reviews, but, I love the freedom and I love the experience that it has provided me. The only thing that I would change about this whole experience is that I would have done it way before now.
Dc Man with a Plan

It is refreshing to read so many positive expressions from sista's with a healthy attitude about the way they choose to rock their doo, while not knocking what others choose to do. Belle said it best when she voiced the view it is cool to choose "X" while not knocking or hating "Y." Y'all have come a long way...but those hours spent at the beauty shop that you can never recover....DAMN. Can you really say you do it just for you--and not the man walkin by or the sista sittin in the pew behind you? Is the impression of others worth all of that? IMO, if dudes had to spend hours at the barber shop, other than before a major holiday--uhmmmm, I'm thinkin that's NOT happenin! A dude might have to get a bigger car or a bigger knot to floss at the club, but standing and waiting at the barber...naw, shortee, we bout to sport that Mike Jordan kinda thang and call it a DONE DEAL! lol
older & wiser

I have worn my hair natural for the last fifteen years and will never go back to being a slave to the curling iron!

I am FREE! Thank the Lord, I'm free, no longer bound, no more relaxers for me!

BTW, I get nothing but love from everyone I meet b/c they say that my haircut complements my face and bone structure.
Ms P

I first heard of good hair when I was about 6 y/o. I remember there were 2 girls in my class who everyone said had good hair. I had long hair too but I knew the difference was the texture. It never bothered me because I had a head full if thick air & my Momma always told ME that I had good hair! I got my first perm in high school. Unfortunately I didn't keep it up & at 16 I had to cut it all off into a mushroom ! I hated it but my hair grew back fast. After that I still got perms but I kept them up. My hair is just too thick w/o a perm. I have always had a perm for decades & I love it. I am always amused when women ask me "What kind of hair do I have?" People assume it's a weave because it is long & thick but it's all mine. Then you have the folks who will just come out & ask if it's a weave! I don't get offended because it is mine but then again even if it was a weave it would still be mine!! People will ask you anything! Smh

I have a daughter whose hair was so thick that I wanted to give her a perm at 5 y/o!!! LOL.However, I didn't but I wanted to. She finally got her first perm at 12 y/o. Although I am thinking about letting it grow out of her hair. Unlike my hair her hair doesn't look as healthy as it did when it was pressed. I do regret perming her hair although it is more manageable.

As for men with curly hair, i have never been into that. I prefer my men bald or with a really low cut, but a bald brotha with a perfectly round head makes me just want to reach out & touch!!!
litrisha

I've always worn my real hair and it was always kept manageable. I'm lucky that I had a sister that didn't "experiment" too much with it and took care of it. Soon after that I would proceed to the hair salon to keep it up after that. I've never really worn weaves but I rocked some braids. I don't have a perm in my hair because I simply don't need one and I wish I would have known this a long time ago. It's been about a year and something now since I've had a perm, I mean don't get me wrong I do miss it and all that "bone straightness" about it but it ultimately thinned my hair out. I wouldn't go back to a perm if it killed me! LOL Not knocking the sisters with perms but they just aren't for me! I am blessed to have hair on my head though, truly blessed for that.
http://nwso.net NWSO

Damn, ain't NOBODY have a damn S-Curl but me?!?!?

LOL
sankore

I came into this world with some good nappy african hair(I was born in liberia). My moms used to french braid me and my sisters hair every week. She would but these beautiful african wooden beads in our hair. But once I hit the 7th grade I begged my mom for the jhere curl. After protesting she gave in. But I hated the soggy collars always dripping with curl juice. So I went back to being natural after a year and my moms started pressing my hair. When I reached high school i decided on getting a perm. I had a perm for 15 yrs. My hair was shoulder lenghth when I decided to whack it all of and started my dreads. I had my locs for 7yrs and I decided to cut them due to fact that they were so long and heavy it thinned my hair. Now I am rocking a fro and it is the bomb. The only down side to me having my fro is that some brothers wont show a sista any love. I love my hair and it is low maintance. All I do is wash my hair with rose castille soap, towel dry and add shea butter, braid my hair and let it air dry and I'm out. As far as men go I love a brother who wears his hair natural. Wether its locs, a fro or a fade.
sankore

@ NWSO

Naw you aint the only one. My younger brother used to wear the hell out of his S curl lol. Dude thought he was El Debarge lol
rh

I have had every hairstyle: weave, jheri curl, relaxer, short hair, long hair, braids, etc. At one point, my whole family had a curl. We went through a lot of activator!!!

My hair is natural now but several of my friends said that they will never go natural because they have no curl pattern. One of my friend's husband told her that her hair was not curly like mine so she wouldn't be able to wear her hair natural.
yoly

i am also very happy to read so many positive post..being a hairstylist i come across so many people who i have to explain this to...when they see me i automatically get you got that "good" hair..then i have to go in the whole story of self love and embracing the hair God gave you and when he made us in his image it was good and so is our hair....what makes it good or bad is how you feel...when you truly love yourself you will love everything about you..i personally only had a relaxer for four years but that was a personal choice because i had to fall in love with me and love me unconditionally including my tresses so in response to the you have good hair i say so do you and im gonna help you learn how to love it..as far as being attracted to a certain hair type on men..i love my BLACK MEN so whether they choose to rock the bald..ceaser..brooklyn..braids(at a certain age its time to let that go personal preference lol) or locs...as long as he is a MAN.. and loves himself we good
moonstarz

I was about 6 when I got my first perm and the worst part was, I didn't even have very thick hair. My mom was young and didn't know any better I suppose. By third grade I was rocking extension braids all through elementary and all through junior high. I was teased for it. I had braids again probably two more times after that and never had them again. In highschool I wore permed hair in a short cut or chin length. My hair would get flaky and I would get scabs. I even downgraded from a regular perm to a kiddie perm. That was the beginning of my journey to natural.

I had my last perm in May 2002. After that, never looked back. I wear an afro or kinky twists. No flakes, no scabs. I do not plan on perming my daughter's hair and my son get's homemade haircuts, LOL

I permed my brother's hair once when he was like 13, LOL
http://undressingher.com undressingHER

I don't have any hangups about hair at all. It's regular to me, not "extra wavy" or anything.

But when it comes to women.........GOOD HAIR is real. As long as it's real, I won't knock it. Long or short, if God gave it to you, I'm good. Just work with what you have.
taylormade

@ NWSO

we was in the hood, we didnt do the S-curl, we couldnt afford it, so we used the "BANTU" and wet the hell out of it
brendadc

I agree with Intellect. Embrace the various hair types/styles out there, as long as they look good! As far as myself, I got my first perm shortly before I hit middle school. Talk about some relief! I hated the press and curl. I still jump whenever there's a heated apparatus too close to my neck! I am content with getting my regular perms. I can't do my hair to save my life, so it works for me. As far as guys wearing the doorags for their waves, I always laugh at the ones with that indented line in their foreheads from wearing their doorags too long or too tight!
thakoolwun

I am soooo gettin me some jerry curls. Only regular though, gotta bring the style back into society.