How Annoying is Your Voice? (Don’t Say a Word)

0 Posted by - December 20, 2010 - Question of the Day, Real Life, Real Talk

Please pardon the language but this is too funny

Maybe I was just in a bad mood, but I wanted to strangle this woman on the train the other day as I was headed home from work. I don’t know what it was but her voice was just grating on my eardrums. It was this high-pitched shriek that sounded like a pig being butchered or Elmo on helium and speed.

She was standing right in front of me and was babbling on and on about absolutely nothing with her friend. I’m sure the color of her sick cat’s vomit was of extreme importance to her, but the mindless minutia of their conversation was driving me batty. The sad part is they rode the train all the way to my stop.

FML!

This isn’t the first time I’ve come across someone with an annoying voice. I remember this one girl back in college I worked with in the library whose voice used to make my skin itch every time she spoke. To make matters worse it got even more nauseating whenever she laughed. It’s kind of like that Seinfeld episode where Jerry dated a woman whose laugh sounded like Elmer Fudd sitting on a juicer.

With that said, I only spoke to her when I absolutely had to and kept the conversations short and to the point.

“Hi, Ans.”

“Hi.”

“How was your weekend?”

“Fine… But let me get started on dusting these books… I’ll talk to you later.”

I’m sure she thought I was a rude asshole but I just couldn’t stand the sound of her voice for longer than three seconds. She was a nice girl and all but I couldn’t imagine the poor saps that actual dated her, let alone put a ring on it. And I hope she doesn’t like talking during sex because there’d be a lot of, “Shhh, put your face in the pillow ‘cause the neighbors might hear you,” talk from me. Well, that’s assuming I could even get turned on by a woman with an annoying voice.

Over the years I’ve dated a plethora of women—some with sexy seductive voices like Ciara, some with raspy voices like Macy Gray, some with soft demure voices like Janet Jackson and even some with lisps like Kerry Washington—but I’ve never gone out with a woman with a voice like Michel’le.

Honestly, I don’t care if a woman looked like the genetic equivalent of Beyoncé and Stacy Dash‘s love child, if her voice is annoying I don’t think I could do it. Well… Beyoncé and Stacy Dash? Okay, maybe I could do it but not for long. I’d just have to keep something in her mouth to keep her quiet all the time. LOL.

Have you ever been attracted to someone until they opened their mouth and spoke? Have you ever worked with someone whose voice just got on your nerves? Would you want someone to tell you if they thought your voice was annoying to them? How important is someone’s voice to how you view them? Ladies, could you date a man with a soft demure voice like Michael Jackson or do you prefer someone with more bass? Fellas, could you date someone with an voice that annoyed you? Or could you learn to overlook it if they were someone you really liked?

Speak your piece…

TOMORROW NIGHT IS NWSO’S BDAY BASH/HOLIDAY PARTY

Looking forward to seeing all you Sock Heads at NWSO’s annual birthday bash/holiday party. I got a lot to celebrate this year so the place to be TOMORROW Wednesday, December 22 is at La Pomme, which is located at 37 W. 26th Street (Bet 6th & Broadway). Doors open @5pm & close @ 11pm. After work happy hour for the early birds 5-6pm; $6 drink specials. Dress code: Business casual. Music provided by DJs Kaos and Norie of Power 105.1, who will be rockin’ until it’s lights out. No list, no cover, just come out and celebrate with your favorite blogger. See the flyer below, designed by yours truly!

  • sunshyne84

    I prefer a little bass. I don’t want to feel like I’m with someone who hasn’t gone through puberty yet.

  • http://thecandyshoppe.wordpress.com Ronnie6676

    When I was in highschool a guy wrote in my yearbook that my voice sounded like nails scraping a chalk board. I think he was just salty because I turned him down…several times. Now that I’m older I get a lot of ummm compliments on how sexy my voice is. I’ve been voice raped a few times LOL. So I think it’s all in the ears of the listener.

  • http://nwso.net/ NWSO

    lol @ voice rped. do you mean ear raped? (copyright NWSO)

  • MzWoods

    The person I’m talking to now….I personally LOVE his voice and have since childhood (which just tells you that it has not changed much…if at all)…everyone else I talks to is like WHY THE FUCC DOES HE SOUND LIKE THAT!!!!??!?!?! And then he laughs and they really talk about him….oh well i love it lol

  • http://wwwinmycomfortzone.blogspot.com/ Southern Poise

    “Have you ever worked with someone whose voice just got on your nerves?”

    Yes,everytime she calls me, and ask for help, I try to rush and get her off my phone, cause the sound of her voice just makes me want to rip my freakin ear off..uugghh..

    I’ve been told my voice is sexy, phone-sex-sexy… I’m like, is that a compliment??? lol. I’ve even had my female friends and sister call me at times when I’ve been laying down or just waking up, ask me “What are you doing, are you laying down?” Yes, “Well you need to get up, cause that don’t sound cool?” My sister said, and I can’t make this up, “I should not be feeling all tingly and sexual listening to yo damn voice, get yo ass up?” lol.

  • Preachthecomedian

    That’s why I quit dating women who smoked..
    I hate women with the daddy voice…
    Makes me feel like u a pre-op

  • http://spinsterscompass.wordpress.com Spinster

    My voice is nowhere near high but not low like a man’s voice. When waking up or when sick though, it can be mistaken for a man’s voice. :-|

    Bass in the voice for men is my preference.

  • Preachthecomedian

    (low Barry white voice)
    oh really Spinster
    got something been wantin to say you for awhile… ;-)

  • Candace

    Have you ever been attracted to someone until they opened their mouth and spoke? Oh yes but more often than not it’s the content that turns me off.

    Have you ever worked with someone whose voice just got on your nerves? Yes right now!!!She talks a lot with an high-pinched voice and gets excited over little things on top of that… she is just driving me crazy mad…My mp3 player is never too far nowadays.

    Would you want someone to tell you if they thought your voice was annoying to them? Of course NOT lol. Unfortunately I can’t change it so if they don’t like it and if they can…they should just leave.

    How important is someone’s voice to how you view them? Not too important unless it’s extreme. When the voice is really unpleasant and/or too high-pinched it becomes difficult to pay attention and take the person seriously because you really just want the noise to stop. You really need to make an extra effort concentrate.

    Ladies, could you date a man with a soft demure voice like Michael Jackson or do you prefer someone with more bass? I need more bass, a lot more :) )

    Or could you learn to overlook it if they were someone you really liked? I have no idea if I can overlook that. I mean.. to like someone you have to talk..often lol…I can’t say never though … I may be able to deal with an Idriss elba replica that who has an annoying voice…who knows

  • Preachthecomedian

    With me it’s more the accent
    I’m in Charlotte North Carolina so we are more of mid-east than down south..
    So when I hear somebody that’s REALLY country it’s annoying
    now Northern women them accents are so damn sexy

  • Candace

    *Cosigns* I live in Quebec and as cute as the man can be…the accent just kills it! Can’t deal with the country accent either.

  • http://spinsterscompass.wordpress.com Spinster

    Sheeeit. Don’t start none, won’t be none. :-| ;-)

  • http://spinsterscompass.wordpress.com Spinster

    I kinda like Southern accents. Blame ignorant music. :-| BUT, if ignorance is ALL that comes out of the mouth of a person with a Southern accent, nope sorry. :-|

    Northern women from where? Northern accents vary from Boston to Buffalo to New York to Trenton.

  • Preachthecomedian

    Girl ur like a pocketfull of awesome

  • Darling

    lmao and smh, yeah I think she had a lil copyright infringement.

  • Preachthecomedian

    Wait country and southen are 2 different things..Southern is like TI
    Country is like pimp C may he rip

    southern is cool my accents southern..
    I hate country accents like I hate people that say Conversate

  • http://spinsterscompass.wordpress.com Spinster

    Why thank you.

    *curtsies & humbly bows*

  • Preachthecomedian

    Depends ..where u from?
    I like cool northern accents..but I hate the arrogant ones…I had a girl from Boston ask me if we pronounce our words corrctly at work..she really thought that
    I had to inform her im in Charlotte nc not Turtle neck NC.. We are the metro of the
    state …largest banking city, etc…I hate ignant folks

  • Preachthecomedian

    So why don’t we make like Shay and DaThrone and make a NWSO connection?;-)

  • http://spinsterscompass.wordpress.com Spinster

    The slums of Shaolin.

  • Darling

    All I have to say is thank goodness my voice is a lil deeper. I work in customer service and have been ear raped a couple times, lol. Even been asked out simply because of my voice. What fun my job is…sarcastically. lol.

    Have you ever been attracted to someone until they opened their mouth and spoke? Yes, but not because of their voice. Stupidity came out and he was instantly annoying.
    Have you ever worked with someone whose voice just got on your nerves? No thank goodness.
    Would you want someone to tell you if they thought your voice was annoying to them? Yes I would, because I wouldn’t want to annoy everyone all the time. lol
    How important is someone’s voice to how you view them? Depends on who the person is and what the situation is.
    Ladies, could you date a man with a soft demure voice like Michael Jackson or do you prefer someone with more bass? The more bass the better! A man with an especially deep voice is an instant spine tingler.

  • http://spinsterscompass.wordpress.com Spinster

    Studies show that men with deep voices can indicate sexual potency. Here are a couple links:

    http://www.canada.com/topics/news/national/story.html?id=20d865fc-cd62-4944-896a-6582fc0adc31&k=67686

    http://en.allexperts.com/q/Biology-664/evolution-male-voice.htm

    Bass & testosterone for the win. :-|

    Preach – lawd hammercy.

  • http://spinsterscompass.wordpress.com Spinster

    Oh, I also agree – a man can have a voice as deep as Barry White (may he RIP), but if all that comes out of his flapping lips is n****-s***, Hell. and No. :-|

  • Rastaman

    I have to say I am biased against grown women who sound like little girls. Not sure why but its personally irritating…I prefer a little rasp or some pitch but none of that childlike patter. But what is even worse than the little girl voice is just bad grammar/poor diction.
    Conversation is a big part of my relating, before I can even focus on what is being said, I need to not be distracted by unintelligible words/tenses or a child like voice. I don’t mind accents, once you hear it often enough your ears become attuned. Plus I live in the New York area, you have to resign yourself to hearing accented voices all the time and some of them come with the most appealing packages.
    One of my most frustrating memories was a young lady, I would see daily on my commute, seeing her daily was one of the rare pleasures of a crowded train ride. I would always position myself to be in the same train car as her and have her in my sight of view. It all came crashing down though when I overheard in a conversation with a friend one day. It was just nonstop unintelligible garble interspersed with curse words…it was like night and day. Any appeal she had dissipated in flash. The only thing I could think was what a loss.
    What with the dudes though who sound like DMX?
    I will overhear people’s conversations and I am wondering is that other person really hearing what this dude is saying because all I hear is a rumble. No words, no diction just sound like a dog growling even Scooby Doo makes more sense.

  • bogart4017

    Strangest thing–when i was a teen i was into women with deep, whisky voices. It was so weird what it did to me. Kinda glad i outgrew it though. I love a slight southern accent with a medium pitch. The kind that they can kinda cover their accent when they conduct professional business and when they relax–that lilt kinda creeps back into their voice.
    Yes i woek with a woman with a very annoying voice–kinda high and whiney and she talks real slow. Its like being aound Edith Bunker all day. I don’t think i’ve listened to so much hip-hop in my life. Its the only thing that drowns her out.

  • http://spinsterscompass.wordpress.com Spinster

    Dear god, do people still say that? :-|

  • http://thecandyshoppe.wordpress.com Ronnie6676

    @nwso evil…lol

  • AD

    My voice is THE ugliest voice I have ever heard. It’s not annoying but just ugly. Like MANY guys who talked to me over the phone before seeing never did want to see me. But when they would realize the lady across the room was the one with the ugly voice on the phone, it was THEN they wanted to talk. I always had this theory, people with nice voices aren’t as attractive as thier voice. But people with ugly voices aren’t so as attractive. It’s just a theory people.
    I like the raspy voice for men…GOOD example Vin Diesel…sexy both him and his voice!

  • http://spinsterscompass.wordpress.com Spinster

    OHHHH AWWWW-CHIE!

  • da ThRONe

    Im officially calling for an end to the Seinfeld references. That show sucked.

    Im sure I could get pass an annoying voice for the right chick. Clearly not the ideal situation but in my experiences you usually get use to things like that.

  • S

    I’ll be the first to say my voice is awful. It’s high and just gross.

    Guys with soft (not MJ soft, his was past ridiculous) voices are okay.

    My mom has a nice grown sound, my dad has a nice tone to his, not bassy but not soft either. Don’t know what happened to mine.

    Is it genetic? I wonder.

  • http://www.nwso.net NWSO

    Stop hating on Seinfeld. You get the corny finger for that. LOL

  • Corey

    Man I just moved north from TN and the accents are quite irritating to me. I think I REALLY dislike the Boston one more than the NY one though.

  • Corey

    Sorry Ans. That show was garbage. Jerry Seinfeld is the richest non-funny comedian I have ever seen in my life.

  • http://nwso.net/ NWSO

    to each his own. great show. #IMHO #ThatIsAll

  • carmool

    I swear men don’t sound like men anymore…I’ont need you sounding like Billy D but damn can I get a lil bass..my own voice annoys the hell outta me sometimes an I have no clue why folks think I have an accent I’m in Cali we don’t have a “sound”

  • carmool

    HAAAA I speak more than 1 language so it sounds even worse coming from me (u r a fool lol) but i don’t have a southern twang i’ont think surfer maybe

  • preachthecomedian

    yes you all do… its southern twang mixed with surfer … its weird..like the best way to hear is to say “she smashed the homie”… that combo of words gives u a Ray J sound… that cali accent

  • http://blackgirlsareeasy.blogspot.com/ NC17

    Whenever I’m on the phone with those Indian outsource people trying to get my computer replaced the first thing I think is, i hope this ugly ass voice sounds sexy in your native tongue because sex with you would make me want to kill myself.

  • MimiLumpkins

    Since the first time I heard my voice (on a tape recorder, at the age of 11), I hated the sound of my voice. In my opinion, it sounds child-like and it doesn’t convey strength, especially when there are times when I am trying to display authority.

  • j

    My dads girl friend just moved on.. and omg her voice irritates the fuck out of me. It’s this horrible high pitched nasal girlish loudest voice ever!! I have never heard anything like it. I feel like my ears are being raped when she talks, it litterally makes me shudder sometimes. And the problem is she is so fricken loud it’s impossible to block out. and Omg her laugh D: her constant nasal high pitched loud laugh that makes me want to vomit. She is a fat woman in her 30s and she literally acts like a 10 year old sometimes. She reminds me of a chipmunk with a voice so high at times she could shatter glass.