10 Reasons Men Don’t Commit (Why HE’s Not Married)

0 Posted by - March 3, 2011 - News & Current Events, Relationships, Love & Marriage

Week before last writer Tracy McMillan caused a stir on the inter-nuts with an article she penned for Huffington Post entitled “Why You’re Not Married.” For the five of you that missed it, it was another one of those cautionary I’m-over-30-and-haven’t-found-a-man-to-marry-me-yet articles. (Think: VH1 stars Chilli and Brandy).

While more times than not these tend to be long-winded rants that don’t amount to much, this one was actually pretty good. Not only did McMillan keep it real by calling her fellow women out for their own self-sabotaging behavior, but she also laid everything out in seven clear points that even the most delusional chick could understand. The only problem is she forgot one key thing. As much as a woman might want to walk down the aisle, it won’t mean a thing if there isn’t someone waiting to greet her at the end of it.

While marriage is always on the mind of most women as the dating end game, most men just see it as the end. This may seem like a foreign concept to the ladies, so here are 10 reasons why dudes don’t commit that I wrote for the good folks over at TheBVX.

1. HE DOESN’T FEEL LIKE HE CAN AFFORD YOU
Believe it or not, there are plenty of men that would love to put a ring on it.  Problem is said ring costs a heck of a lot. There’s even some outdated “rule” about the average engagement ring costing three month’s salary that some women still believe. Even if a guy’s dealing with someone who says she doesn’t care about the size of the ring, deep down inside every woman wouldn’t mind stuntin’ on their friends with a big ol’ blood diamond rock on her hand. That’s a lot of unnecessary pressure—especially in a recession. There’s no way a man is going to propose to a woman he feels he can’t even provide for.

2. HE HAS TOO MANY OPTIONS
If what women say about there not being enough available men is true then the few that actually qualify as a “good” catch have way too many options. According to a 2009 American Community Survey, there are 131,548 more unmarried and divorced women than men in New York City. If you really want to crunch the numbers that means there are 263,096 more unclaimed boobs in the Big Apple alone. With odds like that why wouldn’t an eligible bachelor have Young Money’s “Every Girl” as his anthem?

3. HE HAS MORE TIME
Unlike women, men aren’t born with a set number of sperm so we can procreate well past retirement age without worrying about any complications the older we get. Since guys don’t have to go through the physical changes of pregnancy, there’s no biological clock ticking that puts us on a baby-making timetable. With that said, most men prefer playing the field a bit longer before retiring from the game. Unfortunately, when we do decide to settle down we’ll probably pick a younger model of you. What up, Russell?

4. HE KNOWS SOMEONE THAT LOOKS BETTER THAN YOU
Men are vain and visual creatures. We like women with curves and no wrinkles. So while it’s nice talking to a woman with a nice head on her shoulders, if that combination isn’t offset by some T&A there might be a time delay on that ring. Even if he is open-minded enough to see your inner beauty there’ll always be a prettier face or better body that’ll catch his eye. The simple fact is if a man isn’t initially attracted to you he probably never will.

5. HE CAN’T SEE YOU RAISING HIS CHILDREN
When a man actually gets to the point where he wants a wife, there are a few things he has to consider. Namely, will this hot chick actually make a good wife and mother to his kids? A trophy wife is nice and all but if she doesn’t have a single domestic bone in her pretty body then there may be a problem. We need certain assurances that this woman can take care of the home on all fronts—kitchen, kids and bedroom. That’s the difference between being wifey material and an actual wife.

CLICK HERE TO CONTINUE READING READ THE FINAL 5 REASONS

Pages: 1 2

  • JaciM86

    @NakedWithSocks nice post

  • sunshyne84

    What’s the difference btwn 4 and 7?

  • http://nwso.net/ NWSO

    4, there’s always someone hotter than you (i.e. grass is greener)

    7, you’re boring, annoying, just not someone he wants to spend time with

    strictly physical issue vs a deeper to the core issue

  • Lonias

    Great, concise list.

    Snippets from 7, 9 and 10 are really at the root of the problem with some of us, especially the delusional:

    7. He’s not really attracted to you.
    And there it is! If there’s one inner voice/ feeling we should listen to, it’s the one that tells us if someone likes to be around us or not. We know when we’re not vibing with a co-worker, and if we’re honest, we know if the man we’re seeing is miserable or maybe just along for the “ride”.

    (from #9)
    “The key is for a woman to respect a man knowing himself better than she thinks she knows him. And just because you’ve been together for a long time is not a good enough reason to get hitched, especially if he’s really not ready.”
    AND
    10. He wants to feel like it’s his decision.
    This isn’t easy…it’s not easy to navigate the dating arena as an opinionated Black woman who grew up in a matriarchal household — whether or not our fathers were at home. The “easy” (default?) way to handle ourselves is to handle everything. But you know, I think most of us are like me: I don’t really WANT to. I want someone to take the reigns sometimes so my arms can rest…
    I have to consciously let go…on purpose…readjust when I “forget”. But I know from experience that the old adage we’ve all heard from older, wiser women (although it’s grossly misapplied) is true: a man has to be a man. And even though everyone seems to agree that “if Mama’s happy, everyone’s happy…”, it’s doubly true when Daddy’s happy…

  • Lonias

    How important is someone’s ability to be a good parent and spouse to you?

    Sometimes, I feel like I’m the only one who still thinks about these things when dating. I am not a woman who brings “BRIDE” magazine to the fist date, but you better believe that he’s being sized up by these criteria (among others ;) . It’s too late to think about it after 5 years or 5 kids or both! I think most singles just think about now…

  • http://twitter.com/kjnetic peter parker

    i think #1..is definitely.. “me”.

  • http://theworldoftiffany.wordpress.com/ tiffany

    AHHHHHHHH, I was just on a date with a blast from the past talking about this exact thing. I think that men hit that point when they want to settle down and realize it and look for certain qualities, especially the mother to my kids and sex thing. I also think that some women get so fixated with getting married that they are not thinking past the wedding day. Crazy. I know I am ready.

  • Lyndon

    DAMN. Number 5 is probably the most unspoken but truest shit I’ve read in a minute.

  • http://nwso.net Symbiotic Loner

    These are questions (in close terms to those posed by the author) that I ask a woman (usually non-verbally) as I observe and gauge whether or not she’s worth me being committed to her…

    1. Which are you worth more of–a life-time COMMITMENT (priceless) or a ring (of FINITE value)?

    This is a question in response to a question I’ve overheard women say to a woman showing off her engagement ring when they (the women OTHER THAN the woman showing off her engagement ring) think the dude’s being cheap… “Giiiiiiirl, don’t you think you’re worth more than THAT thing? (smile) I go for the priceless things in life myself…

    2. What do YOU has to offer ME since I CHOOSE to commit to a “good” woman?

    Point-blank… I don’t limit my options unless a woman PROVES consistently that she’s WORTH me limiting my options…

    3. Are you wanting to marry me JUST for my seed?

    It’s been an observation of mine that, once kids enter the scene, many women make the mistake of making her husband less and LESS of a priority…which inadvertently can invite the clean-up woman into a once happy home…

    4. Are you aware that I COULD know someone MORE of a woman than you?

    Guess I’m a bit less vain and deep than the men of which this author is referring. Please refer to what was said in the parentheses in (2)…

    5. Are you going to be a compliment or a detriment to me taking an ACTIVE role in raising OUR children?

    This one is a “VERY BIG BIGGIE” to me. I helped in conception; I help in raising. That “once you have the seed, throw away the envelope” mentality (whether overtly or IMPLICITLY communicated) AUTOMATICALLY dismisses many women from being wifey material to the Symbiotic Loner.

    6. Will you continue to be the woman I fell in love with AFTER the wedding? If not, will you be MORE woman than the woman I fell in love with AFTER the wedding?

    If a woman proves consistently that the answer to the first question is “yes”, then she’s wife material to the Symbiotic Loner. If a woman proves consistently that the answer to the second question is “yes”, THAT’S extra credit to being wife material to the Symbiotic Loner. Besides, EVERY man knows an ex-husband who’s been played by some ex-wife. As much as we may laugh at such a man, we’re also taking notes to try NOT to end up BEING that man…

    7. Is “the real you” a Symbiotic Loner repellant by being a b*tch, shallow, not taking care of business in the bedroom, a liar, or selfish?

    Don’t believe the title of that book by Sherry Argoy about men loving B*TCHES–the closest thing the Symbiotic Loner comes to loving a b*tch is loving a REAL woman to take the b*tch’s spot within my love. (smile) Plus, the Symbiotic Loner has natural talents for making shallow females bail. In addition, females not taking care of business in the bedroom bore me very quickly. Also, since women are better liars, the Symbiotic Loner has NO heart in diss-missing a lying female. And finally, exclusive selfishness and pure symbiosis don’t even BELONG in the same bond.

    8. Are you aware that the woman-coined phrase “I love you, but I’m not in love with you” can be said by a man, too? If you don’t expect a man to bug when YOU say that, exercise some common courtesy and TAKE that saying when said by a man AS expected if YOU had said it–non-dramatically. Otherwise, expect much less respect from me and a shullbit label on your mentality…

    9. Are you aware that men have timescales for marriage, too? As said by the author, “…The key is for a woman to respect a man knowing himself better than she thinks she knows him…” If you don’t like being pressured into doing things (and you don’t), PLEASE exercise common courtesy and don’t pressure your man. And, THAT leads to…

    10. Must you be reminded that it takes TWO people to be in a relationship, TWO people to be in a wedding, and TWO people to be in a marriage? NO real man wants to be an appendix in the body of his relationship to his woman OR in the body of marriage to his woman. If you make a man feel like the last smart (or “human”) thing he will do is to marry YOU on YOUR (not his and your) wedding day, you ave ALREADY done significant damage to your relationship that you had hoped would lead to marriage.

  • http://nwso.net Symbiotic Loner

    UGH… When you comment nearly three in the morning…

    These are questions (in close terms to those posed by the author) that I ask a woman (usually non-verbally) as I observe and gauge whether or not she’s worth me being committed to her…

    1. Which are you worth more of–a life-time COMMITMENT (priceless) or a ring (of FINITE value)?

    This is a question in response to a question I’ve overheard women say to a woman showing off her engagement ring when they (the women OTHER THAN the woman showing off her engagement ring) think the dude’s being cheap… “Giiiiiiirl, don’t you think you’re worth more than THAT thing? (smile) I go for the priceless things in life myself…

    2. What do YOU has to offer ME since I CHOOSE to commit to a “good” woman?

    Point-blank… I don’t limit my options unless a woman PROVES consistently that she’s WORTH me narrowing my options to just her…

    3. Are you wanting to marry me JUST for my seed?

    It’s been an observation of mine that, once kids enter the scene, many women make the mistake of making her husband less and LESS of a priority…which inadvertently can invite the clean-up woman into a once happy home…

    4. Are you aware that I COULD know someone MORE of a woman than you?

    Guess I’m a bit less vain and deep than the men of which this author is referring. AGAIN, I don’t limit my options unless a woman PROVES consistently that she’s WORTH me narrowing my options to just her…

    5. Are you going to be a compliment or a detriment to me taking an ACTIVE role in raising OUR children?

    This one is a “VERY BIG BIGGIE” to me. I helped in conception; I help in raising. That “once you have the seed, throw away the envelope” mentality (whether overtly or IMPLICITLY communicated) AUTOMATICALLY dismisses many women from being wifey material to the Symbiotic Loner.

    6. Will you continue to be the woman I fell in love with AFTER the wedding? If not, will you be MORE woman than the woman I fell in love with AFTER the wedding?

    If a woman proves consistently that the answer to the first question is “yes”, then she’s wife material to the Symbiotic Loner. If a woman proves consistently that the answer to the second question is “yes”, THAT’S extra credit to being wife material to the Symbiotic Loner. Besides, EVERY man knows an ex-husband who’s been played by some ex-wife. As much as we may laugh at such a man, we’re also taking notes to try NOT to end up BEING that man…

    7. Is “the real you” a Symbiotic Loner repellant by being a b*tch, shallow, not taking care of business in the bedroom, a liar, or selfish?

    Don’t believe the title of that book by Sherry Argoy about men loving B*TCHES–the closest thing the Symbiotic Loner comes to loving a b*tch is loving a REAL woman to take the b*tch’s spot within my love. (smile) Plus, the Symbiotic Loner has natural talents for making shallow females bail. In addition, females not taking care of business in the bedroom bore me very quickly. Also, since women are better liars, the Symbiotic Loner has NO heart in diss-missing a lying female. And finally, exclusive selfishness and pure symbiosis don’t even BELONG in the same bond.

    8. Are you aware that the woman-coined phrase “I love you, but I’m not in love with you” can be said by a man, too? If you don’t expect a man to bug when YOU say that, exercise some common courtesy and TAKE that saying when said by a man AS expected if YOU had said it–non-dramatically. Otherwise, expect much less respect from me and a shullbit label on your mentality…

    9. Are you aware that men have timescales for marriage, too? As said by the author, “…The key is for a woman to respect a man knowing himself better than she thinks she knows him…” If you don’t like being pressured into doing things (and you don’t), PLEASE exercise common courtesy and don’t pressure your man. And, THAT leads to…

    10. Must you be reminded that it takes TWO people to be in a relationship, TWO people to be in a wedding, and TWO people to be in a marriage? NO real man wants to be an appendix in the body of his relationship to his woman OR in the body of marriage to his woman. If you make a man feel like the last smart (or “human”) thing he will do is to marry YOU on YOUR (not his and your) wedding day, you ave ALREADY done significant damage to your relationship that you had hoped would lead to marriage.

    • Poohzmommy

      I like this a lot

  • http://Www.mysixcents.wordpress.com K. LySha

    Ok so we get it that there are a ton of reasons men don’t want to get married and a ton of reasons women would like to get down the aisle. Now what do you recommend that women do if they want to get to holy matrimony before their eggs dry up? This post implies that as far as marriage goes women are basically subject to the whims and fears and immaturity of men and there’s little to nothing we can do about it except learn to enjoy being single or in uncommitted relationships.

  • http://spinsterscompass.wordpress.com Spinster

    I read that article a few weeks ago, sent it to a few people and posted it on Facebook. Both men & women loved it.

    Stats don’t scare me because there are plenty of places/cities/countries to find men if one wants to – all colors, shapes, sizes, ethnicities, backgrounds, etc. Marriage also isn’t at the top of my list of priorities – not that it’s not important (so don’t think that), but that it’s never been a huge concern for me. Being married isn’t a sole life purpose (and maybe it should be that way for everyone). I’m a work in progress, which is more important to me than having a man/being married. I’m no good in a marriage if I don’t continue the work in progress. I’m sure that some women lower their standards as a result of the scare tactics & statistics, but I haven’t. All I’ve done is become a little more understanding when it comes to certain things, but lower my standards? Never.

    While marriage isn’t on the top of my list of priorities, it’s definitely something that I hope will happen in my lifetime. I say “lifetime” because I’m child-free and plan to remain that way, and most men want their own children so it’ll probably be harder & take longer for me to find someone who’s okay with that. (Now if he has his own child(ren), that’s fine because I’d still love & accept them as my own. But I know for a fact that I prefer to remain child-free for life.)

    Good spouse? That’s a given. If I marry someone, I guarantee you that I’ve vetted him enough to know that he’s a good spouse. ;-)

  • Dave

    You had me up to the use of the word “immaturity.” It’s 2011 and would we call a woman who chooses not to get married immature? We all can decide to date and sex as long as we choose right. I mean as long as you pay your bills and taxes right?

    You are looking for answers without getting defensive….which says you have a a very important quality that marriage minded men look for and that is rarer than many think: The capacity to be genuinely self-reflective.

  • Paulette_bajan_gal

    All these blogs write like all men are perfect…but I’m finding if a man is over 35 and still single…his exes prob had issues with him.A good man isn’t afraid of marriage nor does he have these reasons not to get married.This list was written by a player…not a man that’s marriage material.

    • TruthBeTold

      Thank you! This is written by a moron, like yes men are so perfect and they are just picking and choosing from the row of women lining up desperately hoping to raise his kids. I find it very sad that men perpetuate this bullshit and good man use this as their shield to justify ruining a great relationship. Sad sad sad…

  • Dave

    I just want to add that Tracy McMillan is brilliant. I bought her book off the strength of the article, I am really enjoying it, and after only two days of reading I have decided I want to father her children.

    There’s something Badu going on with that woman….she got that thang….

  • http://nwso.net/ NWSO

    The name’s NWSO, bro. LOL @ “the author”

  • http://nwso.net/ NWSO

    Didn’t think it said all that. Last time I checked there’s no law/rule that says anyone has to be married by a certain age. Yes, it’d be nice before the eggs dry up, but the reality is finding the “right” person at the right time takes time—some longer than others. If you’re (not you) are so busy looking at the finish line when do you get to enjoy the race?

    People get married every day, but the question is how many STAY married? Stats are at 50% divorce rates in US (We’re #1). So I’d rather people take more time to make a right decision and more time working on the marriage after the wedding, which a lot don’t.

    Women aren’t at the whim of men just like men aren’t a the whim of women, we’re both subject to the laws of time. If it’s a “immaturity” thing and you’re (not you) in a rush to jump the broom, perhaps dating older is the answer. Not wasting your (not you) time dating people you know have no long term potential is another. Men tend to tell you up front where their heads are at if women not only listened but believed them.

    I know plenty of women that make some arbitrary plan to get married and get it done, now are those happily ever after situations is a whole other situation. Just because I go to the store and buy eggs doesn’t mean I have to eat them all the next day, that’s what a freezer is for.

  • Lonias

    @ Paulette_bajan_gal (my apologies, but the “reply” link doesn’t work on my Blackberry…)

    I’m curious: how does being a “good” or “bad?” man determine whether or not he’s afraid of marriage (or anything else)?

  • http://nwso.net/ NWSO

    Whatever P. You must have glossed over some of it, cause 1 you know me in the real world and 2, IMHO, while some of the entries are superficial they are not all. No. 5 is some real ish that I think women do themselves, and I’d argue that #7 and #9 take some self reflection/maturity to realize as well.

    #Hmph

  • http://twitter.com/kjnetic peter parker

    Maybe marrying a male friend that loves you?

    just throwing an answer out there

  • JC

    My thing is once these “valid reasons” come to light how often does the man walk away? Especially knowing the woman wants marriage and children.

    In my eyes to stay with someone knowing that you don’t want what they want, even if you “think” you might someday isn’t fair. In the end you are just wasting that person’s time and your own.

  • CharlotteJ

    I think the reason I am not married is my fault. I have been proposed to twice in the last six months by quality men. I think because I am give off a good mother vibe, I can cook, and am smart without being a smarty-pants. But I am not excessively beautiful, but I in a bit of a hurry to find an available viable man to knock me up… I am mid-30′s. I think I give off a “caregiver” vibe and therefore attract needy men.

  • http://preachthetruthteller.blogspot.com/ Preachthetruthteller

    Marriage is a two person contract
    both parties need to be ready for it

  • JC

    Because we are little girls that watched Cinderella and Sleeping Beauty one too many times and we listen to love song and watch Lifetime for hours…because we’re stupid…no that’s not it. Well maybe it is and at times this is when women are the weaker of the sexes. As a friend put it “I don’t want to cut off contact completely because I like having someone to think about.”
    Yeah many a times I knew I should have walked away sooner but that intensity for affection and attention keeps you rooted, even if it is half-assed because it is better than nothing.

  • http://unitingofthesexes.wordpress.com/ T.I.S.H.A

    I’m-not-looking-for-a man-to-marry-me…(lmao) what I am looking for is someone to share the experience with. One who mutually wants to venture down that road of uncharted territory {in his life}. I read that article via blackberry and had a similar discussion with my girlfriend about it, here is what I said verbatim: “I’m sure most women will not agree with her; I think she’s a great writer. She has thoughts and she wrote them with conviction. Whether they’re true or not is another matter. What I got from the piece was this – - – -> “Get rid of the idea that marriage will make you happy…The bottom line is that marriage is just a long-term opportunity to practice loving someone even when they don’t deserve it”. That I already know, so she gets an A+ from me…if I had to say why I wasn’t married according to her; it would be because I am SELFISH”. About three years ago when my long-term relationship of six years dissolved, I realized I knew nothing about how to love a man. This realization brought me on a quest for knowledge…and so it began. I’ve read way too many self-help books to mention. Each author contributing his/her own unique opinions on how it should/shouldn’t be done. I took a little from here and little from there…today I think I understand a little better, but most importantly I now have the ability to execute that particular function. @NWSO, I loved your list. Great information, only as women the ladies need to realize we cannot do anything about #’s 1-5. If he doesn’t see it in you (pretending that you are will not cut it, lmao) you will just have to find someone that does. Often times women just waste time on a relationship that is not mutually beneficial. I’ve since learned to stop looking and pinning away at a closed door which prevents me from discovering a new door with greater opportunities.

    (Teaching Innovative Solutions Honoring Authenticity)

  • http://nwso.net/ NWSO

    Why is he walking away from something he doesn’t even want (admittedly)? Shouldn’t she be walking away because he’s not offering what she’s looking for? Not trying to (once again) put blame on woman but she has power in situation as well. Why sit back and wait for things to happen and others to make decisions for you and your forever? In my eyes, to stay with someone you know you shouldn’t be with anyway isn’t fair to your damn self (Not you, JC, but this fictional woman we’re speaking of)

  • Rastaman

    Most women are more concerned with marriage than most men is the conventional wisdom. I understand why because they have been socialized to believe they have an expiration date and so they will need to have that type of commitment in order to feel secure. I thinking it’s crazy to ball out on an engagement ring in any economy. Engagement rings are a farce and if I ever get married my prospective wife would be happier not expecting one. I have told women in the past I would rather put a down payment on a house in her name; take her on a great vacation than buy some De Beers diamond marketing idea of love or commitment.
    2 stats I find always appealing are there are more women than men and 10 percent of men are gay. I say, more for me!! LOL
    I can account for taste, because to say women have lowered their standards would assume they had standards going in. I think many women have convinced themselves that they are better than most of the men they date but in my experience most have what they deserve. If you are dating or married to a trifling no good bum it is probably because he offered you the best opportunity to get what you wanted. If she believed she deserved better she would not have gotten with him to begin with.
    Assessing whether someone will be a good spouse is a holistic process. I think it is more important to know whether you can be a good team at building a life together. Not everyone can be a good parent or a good spouse all the time but it is important to be with someone with whom you work well. The “One” is an idea to keep folks from being hopeless about relationships especially when they don’t have one or the one they have is really going down the drain. 6 billion on the planet, you really think there is only one person for you?
    That list is 5 of a myriad of possible reasons why some dude may rationalize why he did not marry some chick. At the end of the day you either make the commitment or not but just be up front about why you don’t want to make that commitment. Marriage, love are not rational acts so trying to rationalize them is a fool’s errand. I advise women that if they want to get married and have children with a man, don’t be passive waiting for him to decide whether you are worthy because there is a 50/50 chance you will be disappointed. It is your future also so you better be damn sure you keep looking out for it because no one else will be.

  • Rastaman

    Please that is a line every playa in the game uses:
    “Baby, I can see you being the mother of my kids.”
    Biggie: “Cause I see some ladies tonight who should be havin my baby Bay-bee “

  • Candace

    5. HE CAN’T SEE YOU RAISING HIS CHILDREN

    While I find that interesting, I really think that if women were as discriminating in their choice, the over-population problem of this planet would be over soon.

    … Lists don’t make anyone happy especially those listing what others are supposed to be, behave or feel…

    I think the first thing we; as; women should give up is the model of whatever the “ideal man” is supposed to be. He is not black, rich, handsome first. First he is reliable, decent, works or is willing to and he values you as a person.

    The sentence that most striked me from Tracy McMillan post is “Men of character are, by definition, willing to commit.” (I’m with you on that Miss Bajan Gal)

    Therefore it would be interesting that women worry about nurturing themselves as individuals inside out because the rest will take care of itself.

    Fortunately as well, not one couple I know is the same as the next, people are different with all different taste or problems….It is absolutely ludicrous to think that because you are angry you won’t be married, we all know a few very angry very married women and men (happily is another story but none of this items on the list actually guarantees happiness)

    The list thing of what the other is supposed to do or be always make uncomfortable. I just don’t see why I should worry about what men want in general, one in particular sure after I think about what I want and need myself but worlwide generalisations? Really not my problem …

    About the men shortage now, there is hope for the youngers generations of women who will most certainly find a husband in China or India where 50 millions men of 20-30 yrs old will be without wife prospects in a few years.

  • Candace

    I sure like that answer…it may not work but I do like the whole friend/lover duo.

  • Candace

    Very wise comments in my opinion.

    Diamonds? ethically uncertain (South Africa, Sierra Leone) I like the down payment idea.

  • Rastaman

    Yeah lose the “Fairy tale” reasoning, men are exposed to that too and most of us don’t are not pre-occupied with being Prince Charming. Most of the women who are pe-occupied with these issues are in love withthe idea of love and that will be a downfall everytime. If we just had time to live and not much anything else most of us would probably be more satisfied with our lives. Because living is doing.

  • Samantha

    So men don’t have as much time as they would like to think. You may be able to procreate forever but that doesn’t mean it’s okay. Recent information has proven that the older the sperm the more defective it is. So ladies be careful when picking an old fart ’cause your kid could end up with more problems then they would’ve if you went for the younger man.

  • http://nwso.net/ NWSO

    What I wanna know is who gave the article a “sucks” rating at the bottom? LOL

  • http://preachthetruthteller.blogspot.com/ Preachthetruthteller

    Tell me how what you said has helped me eliminate a potential girlfriend for me.
    I asked the question on Facebook Saying would you rather have an engagement ring or take the money and get a vacation or down payment on a house.
    This woman said that a down payment is nice BUT she rather have a ring because it’s holds more significance. WTF
    Now she’s gonna wonder why I don’t talk to her no more…that statement alone told me more than all our conversations have….
    Lol
    THANK YOU BIG HOMIE

  • da ThRONe

    If you have to ask “Why your not married” that’s why your not married.

    I think too often people completely miss the point of being together. Marriage should be the bi-product of a successful connection. There are no guarantees being married make things permanent. If anything if both parties aren’t properly prepared it will just be that much more messy when you guys split.

    I think women shouldn’t be against discussing there plans with their men. Also don’t be afraid of putting the option of marriage on the table yourself if you feel like things aren’t progressing fast enough.

  • WinterNights

    Mr NWSO Sir, your whole comment is the truth, the whole truth and nothing but the truth. I grew out of this silly mentality. Yes we are a bit screwed up when our emotions get all mixed in with a man but FOR THE LOVE OF YOUR DESIRES ladies, get out of a relationship that is not fulfilling your needs. If he is not hinting at marriage and that is what you want, get out. I HATE when women start playing the victim role of “He wasted 10 years of my life and he didn’t propose”. Ugggh, so sorry for the rant. I had to sit through this conversation recently and home girl has been saying the same thing for the past 8 years. The guy in question is getting married to someone else.

  • http://www.stylefelons.com Tiffiny

    If he doesn’t want to be with you, don’t waste your time! On to the next one.

  • jaclynsd

    Do you feel women are more concerned with marriage than men? I think some maybe. To be honest all of my girlfriends aren’t. But from the looks of t.v (and articles) you’d think they were.

    Isn’t it ridiculous to ball out on an engagement ring in this economy? Very, but like I’ve always said if the wedding and ring are bigger than the commitment then there’s prob a reason. Trying to make up for what’s lacking.

    Wouldn’t you rather put down on a house than a piece of jewelry for only one-half of the couple? If I actually meet the person for me I’d have it in the court house and call it a day. A ring that size should be bought after like 20ys of marriage when you’ve actually built something, not prior to starting you life together.

    Do the stats about there being more women than men scare you? Scare me? No, not at all lol Yes there will always be younger and prettier but loyal, honest, someone that makes you laugh and worth your time…all the things that matter don’t come w/that. Looks are easy to fix. Especially nowadays where 40yr old look like 20yr old. Trust me I know like 5 chicks that are hotter than me and I’m attractive. If a dude passed me for those chicks I’d get out his way, cause trust me when I tell you those girls have nothing on me but looks. There are some shady woman out there and if looks is all you care about then go for it.

    Are some women lowering their standards as a result? Not sure, I don’t know any that are to be frank. I think woman are being more realistic now than before though. There is no prince charming cause um honey you aint no princess either lol

    How important is someone’s ability to be a good parent and spouse to you? Very, especially if you have children already or if you plan to have any.

    Do you believe in the idea of “the one?” I think there is that one person for you but I also believe there are several that will complement you very well too. “The one” may not be ready for you or to many things may have happened in their lives and it’s just not your time. Do you wait (for something that may never happen) or do you find someone that wants what you want.

    How many people agree with most of the full list? What did or didn’t you agree with? I agreed w/most of it except for few things on #4. We know better looking men than you too but at end of day just like us you’ll need some substance.

    I was just talking to my girl (well older woman she’s 40) the other day about this whole thing about men having WAY too many options. She put it like this…”men nowadays have WAY too many options why would they want to get married, one you don’t have to buy the cow cause the milk is given in every corner and and available in every flavor and color” She also said “woman don’t demand anything from men now and they don’t respect themselves like they use to, they don’t hold men accountable, its like we traded roles, so if a woman past her 30s wonders why she’s not getting married, and closer to 35 than marriage, the reason is that men have too many options, and WAY too many easy ones at that” I was like DANG she nailed it. And the sad thing is this is coming from a happily married woman of 20yrs. Her and her hubby go out and they both admit society has really changed.

  • Lyndon

    I’m talkin about men who conscious thinkers. You talkin bout the same brothas that have 10 or 12 baby mommas. They don’t give a damn about where they plant a seed.

    I’m referring to is the crossroads I come to when it’s time to really consider what this woman has to offer besides sex and fun. And in most cases the women I meet are shallow and selfish. When I get beyond that initial attraction, rarely to I see a woman with any value or integrity. Sex can be on fire, and may even be handling their business professionally, but there is rarely any old school maternal traits. Even women with kids care more about their appearance and social lives than their own children. Dude was on point.

  • Lyndon

    “While I find that interesting, I really think that if women were as discriminating in their choice, the over-population problem of this planet would be over soon.”

    Can you imagine if women did this, how different things would be?

  • http://yvonnechase.com Yvonne@http://yvonnechase.com/2011/02/17/he-hasnt-decided/

    I read Tracy’s piece and your piece. The bottom line at the end of the day is men aren’t married because they haven’t made a decision to marry – period. When a man decides to get married, he will look for a woman to be his wife and get married. Its that simple.

  • R.e.D

    I definitely agree with this last paragraph.People don’t realize that the basic problem stems from the fact that women allow men to get away with too much. Yes I said it. If everyone here were to be realistic, we would admit that a man can ONLY do what a woman permits him to do. So what have we done.. we have given them options in the name of evolution/owning our sexuality/ etc.. What this equates, just like above is ‘free milk.’ If I was a man, I’d never get married. What is the advantage?? We women give them everything to them.

    And all these flippin lists, as if the only or shall I say the MAIN problem is the woman. I’m sick of this damn notion. Do you how many single, non-crazy, smart, funny etc women I know?? It’s not like we are pariahs..we’re just single. And why does it have to be our ‘fault’ that we are single?? Sometimes life just happens that way.
    I have so much more to say, sigh….excuse any typo..

  • LTCM

    I always wonder how women have the authority on what a good “man” is…

  • Lyndon

    Do you how many single, non-crazy, smart, funny etc women I know?? ”

    True for some. But what I know for sure is that many of these same women change drastically within a relationship. And who AINT crazy? We all seem sane from a distance. Ive seen many flip the script when its time to make sacrfices and compromises.

    You are definitely right about one thing… Women allow too damn much.

  • Candace

    LOL I have to agree but why would it be A FAULT to be single for a woman? That alone is a very disturbing thought.

  • Candace

    Well for starters women would try not to have children with a man that doesn’t have the qualities or the maturity to be a father?
    The way I see it there would be less children being born for sure.

    To be honest, I have the feeling that we, women, often can’t get passed the whole I like/love him to think over seriously the question of wether or not we shoud have a child with the man in our live.

  • AConleyCreation

    A man being “good” should not have to do with if he wants marriage or not. There are some men (and women) who have no desire to marry or be committed, and this doesn’t make then “bad.”

  • AConleyCreation

    I think lists like this help perpetuate women into thinking they need to change for men. A desire to change should come from the desire to be a better person. If you focus on being your truest Self, I believe everything else will fall into place. Women who feel the need for stability, a child, a giant rock in their finger, love, attention, etc. are seeking fulfillment from an external source.

    Not EVERY woman, even deep down, wants a big diamond: I don’t and never have. I was never the one to dream about this huge deal of a wedding, children, or a giant wedding ring. I can think of much better things to spend that money on… and besides, if you’re marrying each other, that shitload of money he’s spending on the ring is also your money, if you’re going to be pooling your funds together.

  • Rastaman

    I think you maybe overreaching in your response. If I understand correctly the piece is about why he may not want to commit. You can disagree if the points are valid or not but if they don’t apply to you why be annoyed.
    I like when women valuate pre-marital sex, i.e. “free milk” as if men had to wait until marriage they would somehow honor their commitments. Just more evidence of how little women think they know about men. Sex may sell but it does not buy commitment.

  • jaclynsd

    No your right R.E.D when you said “And why does it have to be our ‘fault’ that we are single?? Sometimes life just happens that way” I didn’t mean for my last comment to mean that all single woman are at fault for being single. Not my interpretation of what my older and wiser friend said at all. I feel the ones that do ask themselves (or are desperate to marry) why they’re not married are? Many woman who are single and confident know why they’re single and its usually by choice and because they haven’t met the right person or its just not the right time just like men.

    I wish they would write an article for men on why a woman wont marry you. lol I think w/all these options out here some men feel that just because their ready to wed, women should be running to them to get married. I’ve dealt w/guys like that too. Both men and women have their reasons why they’re just not marriage material.

  • AConleyCreation

    The concept of making yourself catchable is not healthy, in my opinion. If you focus on making yourself a true, honest, good-spirited person, this is where I believe the Law of Attraction works. If you aren’t fixated on finding/catching a (good) man, the right man will come along when he should. Love should be a bonus & about sharing an already great life with someone.

  • Candace

    Well I for one, ununderstood it differently,I saw the free milk comment as a whole relationship not the sex only. All the things that before needed a commitment: leaving together, having kids.
    Then again the way I see it even mariage does not necessarly imply commitment, or only on paper anyway.

  • Rastaman

    But Fish don’t catch bait!!

  • R.e.D

    @Lyndon, now you and I both know that all women are crazy to some degree, but I’m talking certifiably crazy..I don’t have any friends that are over the top- need professional help-type of crazy.
    @Candace/jaclyn- maybe I worded it incorrectly, so the meaning got lost. The bottom line is there is nothing wrong with being single/unmarried, but if you are, people assume it is b/c you are doing something wrong, hence my using the term ‘fault’
    @Rasta- Now I’ve been commenting on this blog for a while now. I’m just an animated person- even in real life. I’m not angry by any stretch of the imagination. To become angry, means that the debate has already been lost. And again, you are putting words into my mouth. I absolutely never said that ‘free milk’ was ONLY about sex. Never. I said that we give everything to men. But since you brought up sex, let’s keep it real. Wars have been waged over the power of the “P.” So please don’t act like this is untrue. And I can tell you, if women in general, were to hold out on sex, there would be more marriages (hopefully successful ones). NWSO wrote a piece some time back about the power of Pucci and he was right on the mark. I think you made comments in reference to men not allowing this to rule them, but just b/c that is Rasta’s reality, does not make it fact. The “P” will never lose it’s power as long as there are men out there….

  • http://spinsterscompass.wordpress.com Spinster

    One moment please.

    *walks toward the light*

  • http://preachthetruthteller.blogspot.com/ Preachthetruthteller

    Her comment told me everything I needed to know

  • DH

    #4 is just wrong, and #7 is just a bad move period. Why sleep with someone you not attracted to? For money? For physical release? Because you want to pick up an STD? Really?!

  • Lonias

    Does it really matter what label you put on self-improvement? It’s still self-improvement…even if it is motivated by the realization that one is “unattractive” to others (men/employers/counterparts). We have to face it that there are people who are NOT true, honest, good-spirited, who need motivation from ANYWHERE to get there…

    A list like the one above is not just written to tell people where they are going wrong. Knowledge is power…

  • Lisa

    Yeah, to some woman…the ring is the most important thing…its good that ALL of us don’t think this way. Preach, I have some friends like that & they’re still waiting.

  • FloatyBoat

    Standing ovation to this post. Some of the reasons might not be pretty, but they’re pretty on the mark. Thankx for the insight

  • http://robyninrealtime.tumblr.com rw

    i’m heading towards mid thirties, still dont feel ready to marry yet, would love a great date

  • StoryofaWoman

    I’ve heard dudes say this before and I definitely feel this. HOWEVER, what I hear more of is ” I was with this girl and she was cool but I just wasn’t into her like that, I didn’t think I should have a child with her and then BAM, she get’s pregnant…..” Why would a man continue to sleep with a girl if he knew already that he didn’t want her to have his kids, and then possibly not be totally up on the birth control……

  • helloimdonna

    You know what?…why don’t we just all meet for drinks and think of a way to hook up with each other “right here” in this forum ~ I live in the Pacific Northwest, but damn!, i will travel the distance to meet my prince charming ~ seems to me, that we are here (NWSO) for a reason, and most all of us, got our shit together, so…!

  • AConleyCreation

    Yes, I believe it matters from where that intention is coming. I don’t believe that change is really true unless that person sees the need to change for their own benefit.

    This is not to say one cannot feel the need to change and also be motivated by the change from elsewhere. But if that person doesn’t feel any need to change and simply does at the advice of someone else, it’s not genuine and likely not to last, IMO.

  • http://nwso.net/ NWSO

    Because (some) men like pretty things and only realize that there are some women that are comparable to empty calories. Tasted good when you ate it but has no nutritional value for your life.

  • Flowy Mitchell

    Haha yea sounds like a great idea!

  • http://www.dcdistrictdiva.com Brooke Obie

    I found your article “Why He’s Not Married,” to be utterly ridiculous. It is so interesting that you say it was a response to Tracy McMillan’s article, “from a man’s perspective.” Though I found her article to be quite ridiculous as well, at least she was a woman speaking to women about why they aren’t married. It’s funny that in your piece on why men aren’t married, there isn’t a single examination of the character flaws in men that should be changed in order for them to be able to sustain healthy and happy relationships. Instead, it was just another (not even) veiled assault on what’s wrong with women: 1) too materialistic; 2) not special enough; 3) too desperate; 4) not attractive enough; 5) not good enough to mother his children; 6) too many golddiggers; 7)and we’re back to not attractive enough; 8) and we’re back to not special enough; 9) too disrespectful of a man’s need to grow; 10) and too “marriage crazy.” WOW!

    Since we’re sharing our opinions, I think you’d do well to examine your misogyny and male privilege in order to come to terms with why you blew a perfectly good opportunity to: 1) analyze your and your brothers’ issues with relationships and the role you all play in why they fail; and 2) why you all are not marriage material. Instead of doing something productive and focusing on yourself and your brothers, you just took another cheap shot at your sisters, and I find that sad, not only for you, but for the women who are unfortunate and vulnerable enough to internalize your critique of them.

    Steve Harvey is making a fortune off of this meme, and you seem to be doing all right, yourself. I certainly hope you find it to be worth the integrity and introspection you’re giving up, in the end.

    Agape,

  • http://nwso.net/ NWSO

    Thanks for your feedback. I was specifically assigned to write why “he’s” not married by my editors so by the title alone I was to write a rebuttal from that angle. If it had been why you’re not married pt 2 then it could have been tackled from the perspective of a man/me to men as opposed to a man/me to women.

    While what was written is mostly pointing out issues some men have with women I feel there were a few that put it on men as well, namely #6 men being scared and #9 not being ready mentally/emotionally. Is that balanced? No, and in retrospect I’ll take blame (for lack of a better term) for that.

    Honestly, I never saw this piece as an attack on women (just as I didn’t see that in McMillan’s piece) rather a window into the shallow minds of (some) men.

    One thing I’ve noticed during my time blogging is that men are rarely in the relationship discussions it’s predominantly women who show up to the events and comment on the blogs. With that said that’s why I generally write to women since the men don’t appear to be listening. I appreciate this discourse because it’s raised a good point that I may discuss later.

    End of the day, though, men generally aren’t having conversations about marriage at the rate that women are. So writing to men about why they’re not married may seem a bit of a moot point. That is part of the problem. The ideals of marriage are ingrained in little girls early on while boys are taught to play war and bottle up their emotions. I feel like I discussed the latter recently but can’t recall the post at the moment.

    At any rate, thanks again for your feedback as you’ve given me something to think about. Like I said, my intent was not attack based so sorry you interpreted it as such.

  • B!

    This is actually an excellent point. I found myself wondering why there are no lists for guys telling them to ;
    “Act like a gentleman, think like a woman.” or telling them 10 reasons why they’re not married.
    But that could just be because most guys DON’T want to get married.

  • http://spinsterscompass.wordpress.com Spinster

    You were quite nice because that comment was kinda rude and seemed kinda personal, like a gripe toward you. The commenter’s point could’ve been made in a more tactful (computer) tone.

  • http://nwso.net/ NWSO

    It was actually an email response to me but I think she raised good points that should be shared on the thread. I take no offense, I write to have conversations so all perspectives are welcome. if everyone agreed with me what fun would that be. You see how R.E.D. always pushes the envelope and conversation forward.

  • http://spinsterscompass.wordpress.com Spinster

    Agreed, of course it’d be boring. Just the tone…..

    Eh. Call me a bit more sensitive & tactful in my old age. :-|

  • AConleyCreation

    Have you actually read Sherry Argov’s book, Why Men Love Bitches?

  • R.e.D

    @Spinster-BrookeObie actually made some pretty solid points. If I didn’t read the blog regularly, this article could’ve definitely made NWSO seem like a misogynist, just as mentioned, so I understand the not-to-subtle hostility.
    Perhaps if she were to come here frequently, she would see more of the ‘Ode to Women’ blogs that he writes (even though recently, we’ve been getting pounded upon….)

    P.S.Loving the jacket w/ pink and black tie. Hope you had on some tight shoes to go with that outfit.

  • R.e.D

    I mean not-too-subtle….NWSO I didn’t realize calling u ‘the author’ was a pet peeve.. Ok so I won’t be calling u that one. But let me just say, the feeling that you get is probably similar to how some women feel when men use the term ‘female.’ I don’t find this offensive at all, but hey, every one is different.

  • Shannon

    It seems to me men are more interested in looking for reasons not to marry. Why settle for one woman when he can have one for each day of the week? I mean, they don’t see a reason to buy the cow if they are already or can get the milk for free.

    It’s been my experience that men see marriage as a loss of freedom rather than gaining something richer and far more valuable. There is more to marriage than money and sex, not to mention most men aren’t so much concerned about how a woman looks as much as they are about how a woman makes him look. So every man wants a super-hot woman on his arm that will turn heads and make every eye on them a jealous one.

    Men want a 10, but they won’t marry one. This is because a woman like that can’t put two words together without breaking syntax, thinks a vacuum cleaner is someone who cleans vacuums and doesn’t know a strainer from a container. Women like that rarely make good domestic partners and we all know, children don’t take after strangers.

    Men aren’t under as much pressure to marry as women are. It doesn’t matter what a woman accomplishes in her life; if she doesn’t have a husband, she has accomplished nothing, according to society and people wonder, what’s wrong with her?

    I only recently began dating again. I just needed time to be okay with doing it and not feel like I was cheating on my husband. I know he would want me to be happy and live my life, so I am going to do just that.

    If a man wants to “put a ring on it,” he should save up for a nice one. My husband couldn’t afford a big rock for me, so I wear a wedding band and still wear it–I can’t bring myself to take it off yet–and it didn’t change the love we had for each other and never will. I was never able to give him a ring and he didn’t care; he loved me just the same.

    I’m meeting new people and I’m in no hurry to get married again–I want a bond like I had with John–so I just enjoy going out and being in someone’s company again. But I do wonder where is the list of 10 reasons why men aren’t married.

  • http://nwso.net Symbiotic Loner

    No, I haven’t… Life experiences and observations has taught me to not give bitches the time of day off a ticking time bomb…

  • http://www.nwso.net NWSO

    No biggie RED. Just if you’re in someone’s home and they’re right there it’s nicer to address them by name rather than “the host.” But I do understand new folks may not know the handle.

    What’s really a pet peeve is use of my government name on the threads. I prefer NWSO here.

  • http://spinsterscompass.wordpress.com Spinster

    You’re right R.e.D. I forgot that most commenters on here (myself included) have been reading this blog for a while (me – since the blog was on Blogger… damn that was a long time ago… I’m getting old) and know that there was no mal-intent. From the outside looking in, this could be the writings of a Steve Hardly protege :-| (especially since, like you said, we women have been getting pounded all over American media a lot more than usual lately), but long-time readers know that that’s not the case with NWSO (the writer and the blog).

  • Lisa

    Steve Hardly….I might have to use that Spinster.:)

  • http://saturnreturns-grow.blogspot.com Othaniel Cruickshank

    Really, I’m so tired of this obsession with relationships that don’t work because he/ she is not for us…..

    Plain and simple

  • http://www.AConleyCreation.com AConleyCreation

    I have read it and I suggest doing so before declaring your opinion of it. This is literally a case of “you can’t judge a book by its cover.” It’s not about being a mean, cold-hearted bitch… it’s about women being true to their self and confident (for the woman’s benefit) and that a quality man will be attracted to this… that a good man doesn’t want to be with a woman who will give him anything & anytime, who is desperate or dependent.

  • http://www.mysixcents.wordpress.com K. LySha

    Ok to be clear I was not trying to say that it’s immature to not want to get married. Sometimes the most mature thing one can do is be honest enough with themselves and their mate to realize that they are just not ready to handle that type of commitment. I suppose I threw immaturity in the mix of issues women have to contend with from men because of #2, he has too many options. It takes maturity to recognize when you have found a truly good thing and to fully appreciate it once you recognize this. It also takes maturity to realize that while there are many options out there for men, it’s still worth it to hold it down once you’ve found someone of quality to be with. At any rate I didn’t want the maturity thing to overshadow my point so I should have left it out because I was more concerned about the whims and insecurities. (I don’t want to marry an immature many anyway)

  • The Duke

    the purpose of getting married is to satisfy everyone but you: the government, the clergy, the diamond industry, the wedding industry (i.e. caterers, food & beverage, etc.), and the wife-to-be (who will take 1/2 of your money and assets once she divorces you).

    You still wish to sign on a marriage contract within this NAZIFEMINIST Society? listen to me..get a life!

  • Troy

    Men don’t get married “right away”, because they don’t have to nor feel the desire to do so. However, a man will get married and narrow his sights on that one when he individually decides marriage is important and beneficial to his life. Most importantly, this decision usually begins to take shape “before” he meets her.

  • Emeraldsky@gmail.com

    My guy and I have been off/on for 6 yrs. The 2nd year he asked me to marry him. Shortly thereafter, I found out he was trolling internet dating sites pretending to be single. We broke up. Got back together. Same thing. Broke up. Got back together — got engaged again.  We did this THREE times and it was getting old. I couldn’t understand why he wanted to get married but he still wanted to play ( but ALWAYS denied it).  He is no little kid – He’s been married twice and has 3 kids – 4 grandchildren. We got back together AGAIN 6 mos ago and are getting married for SURE. Plans are made – invites are out – food is ordered -  It took this guy SIX years to finally commit to ME. Did I have to keep proving to him that I was the best one for him?  Did he think the grass was greener or he was entitled to have “fun” as long as he didn’t think anybody would get hurt?  I will never know those answers.  Did he grow up? Maybe. He knew every time he screwed around on me that I would leave.  We each had other relationships during that time we were apart thinking we wouldn’t get back together..  but we always found our way back  to each other. Friends/Families just rolled their eyes when they heard we’d reunited for the 16th time and even MORE incredulous when we actually planned a real wedding.  He finally figured out that if ever planned on keeping me for any length of time – his greener grass would have to go.  He always said he loved me but I knew he was never l00% committed.  Now I believe he is.  Waited 6 yrs for this because I knew he loved me and I loved him.  He just needed to grow up.  Life is good.  I am philosophical in this life and believe we were meant to be together.  Always follow your heart.   Patience paid off and I am happy.

  • Anandaone

    Another reason men “don’t want to commit”: men like having sex, and don’t want to be subject to having that taken away from them a couple years in.

    I don’t know why women dont get it.

    • TruthBeTold

      that’s the old model. a wife and husband not having sex? You ever wonder that maybe you’re not a good lover? Think about it , no woman would ever turn down great sex from her hubby!

  • Frankop

    it is more like the WOMEN CAN’T COMMIT to us men today. it is bad enough that many of them have such an ATTITUDE PROBLEM, and are certainly VERY NASTY TO TALK TOO.  that is the whole problem today, many women just seem to NEED so many men at one time to PLEASE THEIR SORRY ASS, instead of just being with ONLY ONE MAN.

  • Frankop

    i would have to say that it is the women today that can’t seem to COMMIT to just only ONE MAN, and seem to have a NEED for so many men to please them at one time. why is that?  many of us STRAIGHT MEN now are looking for COMMITMENT just to meet that ONE SPECIAL WOMAN to make us very happy. i can easily COMMIT myself to one woman for me. i do not need so many DIFFERENT WOMEN to keep me happy, the way that women seem to need a VARIETY OF DIFFERENT MEN to keep them SATISFIED. too many LOW LIFE LOSER GARBAGE WOMEN that are out there now, what a shame.

  • tardy4daparty

    where can i view 6-10

    • NWSO

      Didn’t realize when TheBVX got bought out that their links didn’t redirect so I updated the post with the final 5. Just click the new link and you’ll see them 
      :)

  • Kristen

    Who wrote this misogynistic, unsupported, non-scientific, crazy shit?

  • Irena

    Results were a bit long to arrive but I assume my case was too complex to have a fast success. But when the spell started to take effect, it was very powerful and in just a few days I had a great outcome. Even if I sounded a bit desperate while I was waiting for my spell to work, Dr. Lee never left me alone and always answered my emails. I am more than satisfied! Thank you.

  • TheAbsoluteTruth

    to be honest, it is more like the women that just don’t want to commit to men. trust and honesty is much more important in a relationship nowadays, especially if you are very compatible and love one another too.

  • JOLLY

    Hi, I am JOLLY MENX from Germany,I just want to say thanks to Dr IRABOR for taking time to help me cast the spell that brings back my ex lover{now husband},who suddenly lost interest in me after six month of engagement,but today we are married with kids and we are more happier than never before,Thanks to Dr IRABOR for his help,he deeply enjoy helping people achieve their desires, find true love,getting their ex lovers back,stop abusive relationships,find success,attract happiness,find soul mates and more,contact him today. and let him show you the wonders and amazement of his Love Spell System work,He deliver results at his best in real spell casting,email iraborspelltemple@gmail.com for relationship matters.