Should a Woman Keep Her Ex’s Last Name When Remarrying?

0 Posted by - August 8, 2011 - Relationships, Love & Marriage

Traditionally, a woman takes on her husband’s last name when she gets married. Sure, some hyphenate but, for the most part, most women become Mrs. So-And-So. As a young boy I had no clue what legally changing your name entailed but when my mother told me all the hoops you have to go through I understood she never went back to her maiden name after divorcing my father. It was just too much hassle and she was used to the name at that point.

It’s one thing for a woman to stick with her ex husband’s name because of the paperwork or being “used to it,” but it’s a whole other thing when a woman keeps the name when she gets remarried. As odd as that may sound, my homegirl told me how her mother hyphenated her name when she got remarried but not with her maiden name but her ex-husband’s surname, which she went by when she met the man that proposed to her. Why, pray tell? Because she liked how her ex’s name sounded.

#BlankStare

So many thoughts ran through my head when I heard that: What did her new husband say when she told him? How do you start that convo? Whose name would any of their future kids carry? But really, who does that? Well, I guess she does but I don’t know how I’d feel if my future Mrs. Socks On wanted to be Mrs. Ex-Husband’s-Name-With Socks On. See, that just doesn’t sound right.

It’s just as bad as what Kim Kardashian’s mother Kris was trying to do on an episode of Keeping Up With the Kardashians I saw the other day. Since the Kardashian had gotten so popular, Kris wanted to drop the name of her current husband, Bruce Jenner, and go back to her ex-husband’s surname because it was a “better” brand.

Bruce didn’t directly object but he was obviously hurt. It was like Kris was saying that his Olympic-gold-winning name wasn’t good enough for her anymore. That she’d rather be associated with her ex than the man she claims to love now. That’s pretty darn emasculating when you think about it. I’m sure Bruce already feels like he’s forever in Rob Kardashian Sr.’s shadow since he passed in 2003. Those feelings would only be amplified if Kris were to rescind ownership of his name. Fortunately, the Kardashian girls talked some sense into their mother and the Kris Jenner name remains intact.

All this may seem silly to some but traditionally speaking your family name means a lot—especially to a man. I’m not saying it’s fair or right that a woman has (chooses) to give up her surname when getting married but I’m sure we can agree it’s the norm—right or wrong.

If my future wife wanted to hyphenate I really wouldn’t care; it’s likely a conversation we would have had long before we said “I do.” But if she was previously married and wanted to keep that dude’s name in the mix she’d get some serious side-eye from me. That would just be a constant reminder of another man every time I saw my wife’s name like he’d somehow still have ownership over her heart. Or maybe it wouldn’t be that serious because people would assume it’s her maiden name and there wouldn’t be any questions about the hyphen, but still deep down inside a man would have to feel some kind of way about his wife carrying another man’s name.

It’s not like in Kris’ case where her decision was based on “branding” because as a writer I understand how important a name is to your career, but if, for instance, a woman just likes Tiffany Mack (her ex-husband’s surname name) over Tiffany Buford (her maiden name) and wanted to add Buford alongside mine or just keep hers professionally I’d understand. But to just arbitrarily have Mack in our mix, that wouldn’t jive well with me or at least I don’t think so. I guess I’d just have to be in the situation to know for real but it’s definitely something to think about.

Do you think a woman should follow tradition and automatically give up her maiden name when getting married? Is that tradition sexist? How many men would be cool with their wife not taking their last name? Would the same apply if she wanted to keep the last name of her ex-husband? Would you see that as a sign that she’s not over her ex? Would a woman see her new husband as “weak” if he didn’t fight for her to have his last name? Should a person’s last name matter as long as they’re in love with their spouse? Is a woman not taking her husband’s last name a valid reason for calling off the wedding? How many men would take their wife’s last name?

Speak your piece…

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  • Ish

    I have my ex-husband’s last name still. If I get remarried, I’d consider hyphenating the name, but only because my son shares the last name and my ex-hub is no longer involved in his life, so my son wouldn’t feel left out. I see how it would be an issue, but, I’ve already spoken to my boyfriend of almost 8 years and he understands how I feel about that. Now if it was a no-go for him I’d respect his wishes, but then I’d have to hyphenate my son’s name so there is no confusion.

  • Paulette_bajan_gal

    I am seriously thinking about dropping my ex husband’s last name.It’s just really weird sometimes especially since he remarried.Our daughter has the hyphenated version of both our last names and someone at a government agency asked me recently what will my daughter do when she marries since she would have to either drop our last names or hyphenate a second time.lol.

    It is seriously a pain in the arse to now have to go and change ALL of my legal documents back to my maiden name but it is something that should be done once you divorced.I have a lot of friends who kept the last name…remarried and just kept it…their kids with new hubby just picked up new hubby’s last name.It is really a weird subject.I will never change my last name again.There’s no guarantee any marriage will last.Best to keep the Maiden name forever.

  • Thelovepassionista

    I was actually thinking about this today because my ex and I were having a not so friendly text conversation (whole nother subject) and when he said bye after being heated he said “Good bye L______ C________”(my ex’s last name which I still have because I haven’t remarried or felt like changing ALL my docs back) It sounded like he was still mad about the whole ex incident which made me think about this whole subject. People DO treat you differently based on what your name is so I def understand some people’s stance on this …. Maybe that’s just cause I’m Latin but look Arabic but all of a sudden when your name isn’t so “ethnic” people treat you way different. But if I got married I would def either change it to his and leave the past in the past.

  • Vgeorge75

    I sort of agree with Ish. I didn’t keep my ex’s last name but only because I was so thoroughly disgusted with him. But if I had it would only be to make sure that my daughter’s sense of self remained intact. At this point she’s already brought up the point of changing her name and she’s 6. To each his (or her) own but I think that if you remarry, you should relinquish the ex’s name. On a side note, I think it would be an excellent trend for couples to blend both last names (bride and groom) to create a new surname so both side have to adopt a new name not just the bride. New times, new rules.

    • Tipster

      Blending the names is a noble thought but I dont see that working. Let’s look at an example. Maiden name Jones married name Lewis new name Jones-Lewis. We have a Jones-Lewis son who marries a woman named Clark-Richardson. What are our grandkids named? Jones-Lewis-Clark-Richardson. That baby is going to have a hard time remembering that. That’s what my mind went to. Please correct me if you were thinking something totally different.

      • Anonymous

        I think she was saying blending not hyphenated. Like Lewis and Jameson marry and become Lewison a combination of Lewis and Jameson or just make up a whole new name like Nwoki or something that has a meaning in another language. I know a girl that did that. They weren’t even married they had a baby and at the christening ceremony they as a family took on a new name. (Never made it to the altar).
        That’s my take on her theory.

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        • Tipster

          Well if you keep on blending no one is going to have the same name as their mom, dad, brother, grandpa, etc after they get married

          • Anonymous

            yeah that’s what I was saying too

  • http://liferequiresmorechocolate.blogspot.com/ sunt97

    Last names should be returned upon divorce finalization.  I don’t understand why people want to carry someone else’s name if you are not married.  It’s like saying that he still defines who you are.   Leave the name, take your ring.

    Peace, Love and Chocolate,
    Tiffany

    • Anonymous

      When you say “take the ring” you’re talking about the guy, right? Like, take your engagement ring BACK dude cause it came with a name. #LMSO

      Check My Interactive Business Card: http://flavors.me/anslem

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      • http://liferequiresmorechocolate.blogspot.com/ sunt97

        Well actually if we went through with marriage it belongs to me. Or if he is feeling lucky he can say let’s go see how much we can get for these and the local gold spot. 50/50.

      • Gemini

        @Ans..if we married my name would be, White-With Socks On. I’m Black. HA!

        I’m never changing my last name. 

      • Gemini

        @Ans..if we married my name would be, White-With Socks On. I’m Black. HA!

        I’m never changing my last name. 

      • Gemini

        @Ans..if we married my name would be, White-With Socks On. I’m Black. HA!

        I’m never changing my last name. 

      • http://www.facebook.com/profile.php?id=666492378 Autumn Onley

        You give engagement rings back if the marriage doesn’t happen.  I’d only give my e-ring back if we divorced if it was a family heirloom on his side.  My e-ring is from my momma so it stays with me 4eva or until my daughter wants to get married.

    • Gemini

      Tina Turner kept Ike’s last name

      • http://wwwinmycomfortzone.blogspot.com/ southernpoise

        Well, that wasn’t her first name either..

    • Gemini

      Tina Turner kept Ike’s last name

  • Tipster

    Nobody in my house has the same last name and no one feels left out lol. If a man allows yes I said allows his wife to keep her ex’s last name that is a reflection of how their whole relationship is going to work. He needs to man up and tell her how that name thing is gonna work. I think thats a battle worth fighting. Women get all apallled and upset about the most trivial things but try to make our men accept foolishness. If a husband proposed to a woman with the ring he specifically picked for his ex wife, that new wife would have a fit. Or if he wanted to name his daughter with the new wife after the ex wife bc he just “liked the name so much”? Now that sounds down right ridiculous. Just as ridiculous as u keeping your ex’s last name after re-marrying. I wouldn’t want to marry a man who let me do that.

    • MKMama

      haha! My ex proposed to his new wife with the diamond that was mine, on a new setting. She proudly wears it, even know this!

  • http://lesleyhal.com Mslediva

    I think that a woman has a right to choose to keep her ex husbands last name or not. It’s a part of her history especially if kids are involved. I think a man should get over himself and allow her to make decisions that may be important to her like branding for instance. What if she was married to a famous person? Or what if she had acquired quite a bit with that name and she keeps it for business purposes? Lastly, what is she’s an Elizabeth Taylor or Erica Kane type and just want to have a long ass name because she’s a serial bride, then what? If the woman is marrying you, then you have her regardless of her last name, so check your ego at the door men and just be glad that she walked down that aisle to become your wife in the first place. Women are always compromising themselves for men in more ways than I can count, and now that we want hyphenated names, you all got a problem with it thinking it means something more than what it is. I think there are better things to stress over than a name. Maybe I feel this way because I am a woman who is branded by her last name. IJS

  • 4L

    speaking of hyphenated names…. talked about this with my father the other day…my last name is 10 letters and if my mom would’ve hyphenated it w/his my whole been would’ve been like 3 lines on my DL lol I want to hyphenate my name if I ever get married…:and if I ever decide to have kids….poor little tink tinks

    But

  • Kaissa

    I am married, going through a divorce and I didn’t take my husband last name. I kept my maiden name, I didn’t want to go through the whole hassle of changing my documents. Did my ex feel betrayed, I guess that he did but, he also was in the process of changing his last name to his mom’s maiden mame and my kids share the same last name as their daddy’s mother. He doesn’t matter if one takes or refuse to take their hubby last name, all that counts is how the relationship is working out!

  • Kaissa

    I am married, going through a divorce and I didn’t take my husband last name. I kept my maiden name, I didn’t want to go through the whole hassle of changing my documents. Did my ex feel betrayed, I guess that he did but, he also was in the process of changing his last name to his mom’s maiden mame and my kids share the same last name as their daddy’s mother. He doesn’t matter if one takes or refuse to take their hubby last name, all that counts is how the relationship is working out!

  • Rastaman

    So are we doing an “ex” theme this week?
    It is still early in the week but I like to be prepared for what is to come.  
    I am not married nor have I ever been married but the way I currently see it is a decision to be made by that individual couple.   My mother was married before she met my father and also worked at the same place for 20+ years.   When she started she used her first marital surname and just never changed it even after marrying my father.   So when I was growing up I came to hear my mother addressed by her maiden name, her first marital surname and her second marital surname.  I do not recall being confused, I recall asking my older sister at a real young age why mom was addressed by so many different names and my sister explaining it.   I do not recall my father been anyway upset about it but I also know my parents did not spend a lot of times concerned with what other people thought.   It is from my parents that I learned that people should focus on creating a relationship that make them both happy and not focus as much on replicating what they think conforms to the rest of society.  
    My lady is an established professional and well known within her field, if we do get married, I would consider it foolish to insist that she take on my surname.   It will be her decision because I am damn sure not going to mess with her brand.   Globally there are so many varied traditions on marital names that we should never jump to conclusions as to what the taking or not taking of a husband’s surname signifies especially in the US.  After all it may be a cultural or ethnic tradition of which we are unaware. 

  • Krystal light

    I don’t think it’s fair for women to automatically give up their maiden names but I don’t mind the tradition. If a woman took the first husband’s name though she should be willing to take the second husband’s name. That’s gotta be like a slap in the face to a dude.

  • Krystal light

    I don’t think it’s fair for women to automatically give up their maiden names but I don’t mind the tradition. If a woman took the first husband’s name though she should be willing to take the second husband’s name. That’s gotta be like a slap in the face to a dude.

  • Krystal light

    I don’t think it’s fair for women to automatically give up their maiden names but I don’t mind the tradition. If a woman took the first husband’s name though she should be willing to take the second husband’s name. That’s gotta be like a slap in the face to a dude.

  • http://theworldoftiffany.wordpress.com/ Tiffany

    My mom was married for 30 years so she kept her last name, kind of like Tina Turner I suppose. Her current boyfriend talks marriage and she said she would hyphenate. She has had this name longer than she had her maiden name so it makes sense.

  • StoryofaWoman

    In consideration for the women in these scenarios, being married involves more than just changing a name, but an identity. You have to go from identifying with yourself as a single woman with your birth name, to now a woman that is joined with her husband with a different name. I think its such an adjustment to change from being single to being married, that to go back to your maiden name is probably more of a psychological challenge than before.  Your maiden name may or may not fit who you are anymore.  It’s interesting that women are the only ones that go through this, men do not have to change their name at all (unless if using the hyphen).  I don’t agree with carrying the name of someone that you are no longer married to, but in a way I understand why women may not go back to their maiden name.  In the Latin culture, some women do keep their ex-husbands name and just keep adding on names with each additional husband (even if their husband died). I am not sure what I would necessarily do if I was in that situation,but I think the hyphen thing is a little too much, especially since normally it’s the wife’s name that’s hyphenated and not the husband’s (ex. Jada Pinkett-Smith)……

  • Guest

    It makes perfect sense for woman to keep an ex-husbands/deceased husband’s name when remarrying if there are children involved. It makes things cohesive and simpler for the children.  They feel like they belong. My parents are divorced. When they were married though, my mother had a hyphenated name (maiden + married).  When she got remarried, she completely changed her name to my stepdad’s (his demand) and it was a really uncomfortable feeling for us kids… We felt a little like strangers in our own home. Even to this day, she says she regrets completely changing her name.

    If there are NO kids, I can understand changing it back to your maiden.  As far as changing the name just because you’re getting married… I’m planning on hyphenating because of ‘branding’ but will go by “Mrs. Smith” personally.  There are 4 other women named “Laura” in my office and they get us confused in email threads, meeting invitations, and other office things.  It’s ridiculous.  I have carved out my niche with my company and don’t want to add to any confusion.

  • Akrepublican

    I’m in a relationship were my girlfriend wants to keep her last name because of her children, I would understand if the children were young and at home, but these kids are 21, 26 and 28.
    The daughter is married with children.
    I love her very much but i can not spending the rest of my life as the other guy in the shadow of her ex, allot like Jenner my bond with my wife would be our name.
    I would not be apposed to taken her maiden name but I am not going to even consider taken her ex’s.
    I feel a parents bond with adult children is no longer in a name but in the heart, i feel if she really loves me and wants to grow old with me we need a bond of our names, Sadly to say this issue will probably end our relationship.

    • Anonymous

      yeah, that’s a tough one man. Hopefully this all works out for the best. Some may say it’s just a name but with the kids that old it does seem a bit “odd” and pointless for her to keep that name, IMHO. I mean, you’re getting re married people will expect you to have a different last name by definition.

      • Akrepublican

        You know if it were that her husband passed away and she wanted to keep it, I’d accept that,
        If the kids were small I would accept it, but I have to have a bond that is meaningful to me.
        My last marriage was always giving, I have made extreme changes in my life over the past years from a new job, new friends, stopped drinking, started going to church and reading on boundaries of a relationship.
        This really isn’t the definition of a last name it’s about moving on with another person and commitment to me,
        It just way to odd and I feel there is something more that I don’t know.
        I pray we can work this out

        • Anonymous

          Yeah, I hear where you’re coming from. It is a bit of a slap in the face. Still, if her actions and heart show more than what her ex’s last name is and you really feel she’s your everything and she makes you feel the same a name is a small thing to throw that away for. But at same time I definitely feel you. Tough position. I pray it works out for the best.

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    • What difference does the age make? If that name is an important symbol of her bond to them, then it will be forever as they will be her children forever. If the oldest is 28, I’m as.suming that has been her name for at least as long, her adult and family identity is tied to the name she carried through all of it. It isn’t her ex’s name, it is her’s.

      How will you be in the shadows? He is out of the picture. It isn’t as if she took your name then wanted to change it back to her ex’s because his was more famous than yours; a truly mercenary move.

      Why do you feel the bond with children is in the heart and not a name but the bond with you isn’t and can’t be? Why does this one issue indicate the depth of her love and devotion to you? Have you two really talked about this and what it means? Are you really okay with ending a relationship you see lasting until death over this issue? It sounds like you have doubts over your bond with her and want to use this as the litmus test for her to prove her love and devotion to you.
      If you two can’t compromise on this, I’d wager other issues of traditional vs liberal values and approaches will/have cropped up

      • Diotwo

        I am not sure what to do, I am divorced with a small child, and Am remarrying, might I add we have just recently had a baby. While I want to take my fiances name I am unsure if I should hypenate in order for my son not to feel left out. My fiance mentioned to me this is fine with him I wasnt even considering it, now what to do?

        • MissySnow

          I’ve been separated for over a year and will be getting divorced shortly. I have thought about what to do about my last name and decided to keep my soon to be ex’s last name. My maiden name really has no value to me since my father and his side of the family have never been a part of my life. But my main reason is to have the same last name as my children. If and when I remarry, I would choose to hyphenate my ex’s and the new last name. This in no way would be because of my ex and any “hooks” he may still have on me but rather the love and connection I have for my children and my ex’s family in general. I would hope that the new special person in my life could understand and accept that.

          • HaloBaby

             I completely understand your situation and respect what you are feeling. I’m in the same situation somewhat…

        • Anonymous

          Do what makes your family happy. That should always be your goal in decision making from here on out IMHO

    • Dillon

      I agree with Akrepublican.  I’ve been dating a lady for almost 2 years & we’ve been talking about marriage.  She was married for 30 years & I was married for 20 years.  She said she’d like to keep her name & I said I had no problem with her using her maiden name, hyphenating names (I assumed her maiden & my name) or taking my name.  She said no, I mean keeping the name I’ve had for 30 years (ex-husbands name).  She said that’s what all her friends, colleagues & old students know her as (she’s a teacher).  Her own kids are both married so there is no issue there.  Sorry, maybe I’m petty, but I’m not going to lie in bed every night with a woman that wants to be identifying by her ex-husbands name.  She can make up a name, I don’t care, but I draw the line at keeping the ex-husbands name :-(

      • HaloBaby

         Dillon, respectfully, I do not understand why you would get so riled up and angry over her wanting to keep her exes name if she had been married for 30 years and all of her colleagues know her as such and the kids still carry that name (no matter their age). You said she could make up a name but that does not in any way solve the problem. Your disdain is for ‘that’ name b/c it was owned by her ex. That to me sounds like a possession issue and that you haven’t taken into consideration how much meaning is behind her carrying that name.

        I don’t think men realize how crazy is it for us emotionally to get rid of our maiden names in the first place and TRADITIONALLY have to take on the man’s name. If I were in my 20′s again and had the confidence and rational that I have now, I would not be in a similar situation as your wife b/c I would have kept my maiden name. Because of TRADITION and trying to make everyone happy except “ME”…it led to me to take on the dreadful name of my now ex-husband.

        The mere fact that you said, you won’t lie in bed everything night with a woman with her exes’ name reeks of jealousy. She is YOUR woman. She wants to be with YOU. She desires to spend the rest of her life with you? You are willing to negate the WEIGHT and validity of the relationship simply over a name she carries? She had children with that man. She divorced him b/c she probably couldn’t’ stand him but she kept the name most likely b/c of the kids. I would bet a hefty sum of money that she could gives a hoot about the ex… I don’t understand the disdain…

  • Michelle Comer

    My husband’s ex-wife still carries our last name even though she has remarried.  She used to use her now husband’s name on some things, but when she discovered that my husband did not like her using his last name every now and then…she started using our last name all the time.  It’s maybe one thing if you share a son together, as that son will carry the last name forever…it’s a completely different matter if the children are girls and/or the ex has remarried. I find it bizarre to hyphenate your ex’s last name with your current husband’s last name…not to mention disrespectful to both parties.  To me, it symbolizes that you will never be over your ex. I think every woman should be confident in their identity….and confident enough to change it back to their maiden or remarried name.  We can get used to changing the date of year at the new year, but some women hold on to their ex’s name saying that’s what they are known as?? Seems to me that the question is not if everyone else will adjust…but more of the fact of the ex adjusting to letting go of something that no longer belongs to her. 

    • HaloBaby

      Here we go again– this sounds like jealousy. Plain and simple. She has children with this person. If she didn’t have kids and didn’t carry the name for too long, she SHOULD change the name back. But if you are talking about a woman having to change to her name in the first place WITH KIDS…whatever. It’s a name. Why would you get all upset over her carrying her EXes name anyhow? You are with him. Not her. Why must jealousy rear its ugly head and make one assume it’s b/c one is trying to hold on to someone? You must realize that for everyone type of person out there who DOES feel this way, there are probably 5 or 6 who merely do it because of the kids involved.

      My ex-husband, who is now also engaged was married to two other women before (I was the 2nd)…and I NEVER questioned why his first ex-wife didn’t change her name either. She has a daughter with him and wanted to keep the name the same as her child. So what!

      7 Years after their divorce, I met him and thought this was it (my first marriage, his 2nd)… No one goes into a marriage, taking on a new name and thinking maybe there’s a chance of divorce… had I known, I would have kept my maiden name! 12 years of marriage resulting in a divorce and after a set of amazing twins, I still carry the name…So what! It’s not about him… ONLY AN EGOTISTICAL FOOL like our exes would think it has ANYTHING to do with him and wanting to hold onto a shred of hope. If I could burn his last name, I would but my senses come over me when my little girls ask me if they can change their name, too… knowing that I can’t, they are ANGRY about the idea of me changing mine.

      Please don’t assume that women want to keep holding on to their exes… it has much more to do with the love for their children and being known by colleagues with that name…

      • guest

        Completely agree! It’s about the love for the children that were conceived during the marriage. Strong men don’t care one way or another – those are the ones you WANT to marry. Grow up people.

  • HaloBaby

    I don’t know actually… I think some people are trying to make the “TRADITION” of a woman taking on her new husbands last name…much bigger than it should be. I divorced 3 years ago although we were separated for 2 years before that (he didn’t want to sign the papers). We have twin daughters (almost 6 years old) and I’m engaged to a man who has three kids (he has custody of 2, the eldest is in college)… he is expecting me to take on his last name but honestly, my daughters will be the only one’s in the house with my exes last name if that’s the case. I worry about them feeling left out if I take on the last name of my new husband and their step-siblings… The girls have already asked if they get a new name too and when I explain to them that it doesn’t work that way, they are really hurt. One of my daughters asked if my fiance doesn’t want us to be “ABC”s because he doesn’t love them. They are too young to understand and frankly, as much as I DETEST my exes last name, I only kept it b/c of them. HONESTLY, I should have NEVER taken his name in the first place and kept my maiden name and then I wouldn’t be in this pickle. If my daughters were in their teens I probably wouldn’t even care about this issue b/c I know one day, they will likely change their names too (via marriage).

    Anyhow, I think it’s insane for the guy(s) above to claim that the relationship may be over b/c his wife doesn’t want to take his name and wants to keep the exes last name. I mean… isn’t it just FOOLISHNESS anyhow for men to go around claiming that they need to carry on their family name and the woman’s family name comes to a screeching halt when she marries? What is it with this whole OWNERSHIP via your last name anyhow? You have a woman who wants to be with you and MARRY you and you are fussing over a last name — especially not realizing or having compassion for why she may want to keep the stupid name in the first place?

    You must understand that this issue is more complex for the woman especially those women who have young children or who have worked decades building up a reputation with a particular last name. It has NOTHING to do.. I MEAN NOTHING to do with wanting to keep the exes last name. I wish I could put this last name in a vault and catapult into the galaxy but the truth is, I have young daughters who DESIRE that commonality and don’t want to be the odd balls out in our new family… It doesn’t mean squat to me (the last name) but it really means so much for my daughters. When my girls are around 14 or so, I’ll revisit the situation but I hope to God that my fiance isn’t so machismo and arrogant to question my intentions or the validity of our relationship simply b/c of a name. I’m with HIM not my ex. I could give two rats about my ex but my kids on the other hand… I’m very concerned and protective of them and their feelings. 

  • Mirandarights1

    I  have my ex-husbands last name even though I got remarried and that SURE is not for any good feelings about him.  I kept it at first of all to share the same name as my children and then who would not keep Miranda over Munoz?  lol   My hgue overusband is a little bothered by it but nothing to argue over.

  • X Ratz X

    okay what would you do if you had your first husbands last name and remarried and your new husband took your ex husbands last name and drop his last name.

  • MKMama

    I’m trying to decide about this currently. I have the last name Paquette, from my ex-husband. I kept it because we have 2 children together with the same last name. Also, i am a professional with a business and that is the name i am known by. When i call the school and say this is D. Paquette calling they know I’m calling about one of the Paquette girls. Now, to complicate things… I’m getting married in less than 2 weeks. We have twins together who share their Father’s name of Garcia. I want my soon-to-be-husband’s last name of Garcia as well. But, i was thinking of hyphenating it due to the fact that I have 2 other children with that name and an established business with that name. Thoughts?

  • Church watcher

    I have a church member who still carry her ex husband last name, they’ve been divorced 13 years and have a 15year old child. They only lived as husband and wife for three years and lived 2 yrs separated. In reality she only stayed married five worthless years and he put her through it. She remarried 3yrs ago and didn’t legally change her name to her current husband, and about to divorce him. I’ve always wanted to ask her why haven’t you’ve gone back to your maiden name and she once wanted to have a baby with her currently rocky relationship husband and I was thinking damn wouldn’t that child carry another mans last name. But she’s always praying and preaching others business was wondering should I pray and preach how hung up I think she is on her first husband. He has a younger wife and they have kids.!,,, I just think it’s stupid and she asked that her maiden name be restored in her divorce decree

  • Church watcher

    In my opinion I feel if a women asked for or filed for divorce honey, you dropped that looser now drop his name!! Or if he filed it should be her choice who she wants to be!, me personally don’t want you don’t want you with my name. Get over it already children or not