Is Liquor Ever a Valid Excuse for Sleeping with Someone?

Dear NWSO,

I slept with a guy I work with last weekend at a company party. We hadn't even spoken much before then. It’s just many drinks were had then… you know. I’m not sure what to do when I see him next? I’m not necessarily trying to take it "somewhere" but feeling kind of awkward. What should I do?

Well, this is an "awkward" situation for multiple reasons. 1) It's someone you hardly know 2) It's someone you work with 3) You now have to see this person on a weekly basis, whether or not that that's a good thing remains to be seen.

I'll make a couple of assumptions here—mainly that you're a grown woman and made a grown woman decision in sleeping with this guy. If so, now you have to live with the circumstances. Yes, liquor was involved (Hopefully not to the point where you feel you were taken advantage of) but what's happened has happened and there's not much you can do to change that.

Now, you have to look at the situation and see it with sober eyes. Is this something you regret? Did you use protection? Is this person going to be expecting more? Is he someone who can be trusted to not run your name through the mud at work? That last question is actually your biggest concern (well, second to using protection, of course). Being that this is someone from your work you don't want to have your personal escapade affect your income. I'm not sure how lax your office is on intimate employee interactions but this may be something you'd want to keep under wraps for obvious reasons.

When you do see him again I'm sure it's going to be awkward, but you got to keep it cool. No matter how much you think you're hiding your secret from people around you they can always tell when something's up. Like, Why is so-and-so always at X's desk, why does she always get frazzled when X is here, etc. What you need to do is have a sit down with ol' boy alone at some point soon and let him know what's up: it was a drunken mistake (right?) and not your normal M.O. (right?). If you don't want to go there again make that clear and keep it moving.

The guy in the situation may or may not have "feelings" or lust, so it's best to draw your line in the sand now. He may be thinking like "if I could hit once, I could hit twice." If it's not that kind of party, let it be known from jump and don't leave any grey area on that point. But again, it's best to address it sooner than later to not let the awkwardness linger and to be sure to nip any potential office gossip in the bud right away.

At the end of the day, as long as y'all are both single and used protection, no harm no foul. Stuff happens. Maybe there was a lingering attraction the whole time that just bubbled to the surface under drunken circumstances. If you realize it's a mistake (at least for now) then you live and you learn. I just pray you don’t have an office stalker on your hands sniffing around like a bloodhound now that he’s got a piece of the action. So a word to the wise, if you can’t hold your liquor then you need to be mindful of who you drink around or just stop altogether. That way you would find yourself in such awkward predicaments.

Good luck and hope that helped...

Have you ever hooked up with someone at a company party? Is liquor ever a valid excuse for sleeping for someone? Do you think that just means you always lied to yourself about wanting to sleep with the person? Is sleeping with a co-worker ever a good idea? Have you ever had an office stalker? Would you ever risk your job by having sex with a co-worker? What advice do you have for this woman?

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